Olivia VS Olivia : Find My Way Home
by Mydeus
Summary: Chap. 18 up ! 'I'm just tired of all of this...'  / O2 story / Some Polivia too / Please review!
1. Chapter 1

**Olivia VS Olivia : _Find my way home_**

'Stay close to me' I told Peter, a hand on my gun. We'd been looking for Walter and Bell for a few hours but we had no clue of their location. Our last chance was the theater but like we'd foreseen it, thirty men of the Fringe Division were waiting for us. My brain was working fast : I needed to find a way to enter the theater without being noticed. I peeked a moment at the crowd from behind the wall we were hiding and saw Broyles and his team near a car, talking to a dozen of cops. No sign of the other me. I could use it to my advantage. I had good chances that she'd been sent to protect Peter from me, and maybe they were expecting her to come back with him.

Good plan or not, I had to decide now. 'Listen Peter, we're gonna go to them.'

'What? Are you losing your mind? If we get out of here we're dead!'

'No. The Olivia from here had to protect you. I'm sure her mission is to get you back before I can -which I've already done-. I have to pretend I'm her and tell them I want to go into the theater with you because you know something they don't and you want to tell it only to me. It's the only way.'

'This has ninety-nine percent of chances to fail, you know that?'

'What, you think we'd better stay there until they find us? We have to give it a try.'

'What if the other Olivia arrives?'

'I trust her, she won't betray me' I said simply. I took him by the wrist and led him to Broyles. When they turned their heads toward me, my heart missed a few beats. They didn't seem to be surprised to see me. That should have been a good point but that didn't make feel safer. My fingers clenched around Peter's wrist and I tried to ignore the cold sweat running on my neck. 'If they realize' I whispered, trying not to move my lips. 'Try to save your life. Don't bother for me.'

'Liv, I...'

'This is not a debate, Bishop. Just do it.' We were now only a few steps away from them and I could see clearly now that they were smiling at me. It was working. I smiled back, at least I tried, but it surely had looked like a grimace.

'Good job, 'Liv' Charlie said with a pat on my shoulder. 'Did the other Olivia come on your way?'

'I... No' I said, my throat dry. 'Everything's fine. He,' I told them with a nod toward Peter, 'says he knows something about the machine to get back to their universe. It's in here, but he wants to show it to me. Only me.'

'Mister Bishop, I understand you have your reasons to want to keep it secret, but I'm not sure you realize this would save a lot of lives. Your medical knowledge is more advanced than ours but we have the technology to develop it. If you know the way to cross between our universes, everyone could take benefits from it. But I have to see it to believe it.'

'Your agent here is the only one I can presently trust. I'm going with her.' Peter was doing his best to be convincing but I could feel hesitation in his voice.

'As you wish. Agent, I give you ten minutes.' I nodded and yet I didn't know if it was going to be enough. But there was no way we could get back on our decision and we headed to the entrance kept by four policemen on each side, feeling their stares on our backs. I had a bad feeling. At first, I thought it was an impression because if they had knew they could have killed me the minute I showed up. We were four steps away from the door when I realized it was a trap. I saw Peter being taken away from me and the second later I felt three pairs of strong arms around me. There was no use to struggle but my pride told me to fight back. I tried to kick their legs but it had no other effect than triggering their anger. They pushed me against a wall roughly and the force of the impact left me breathless. While the stars were dancing in front of my eyes, they put handcuffs around my wrists and tightened them enough so that the blood almost couldn't run through my fingers. One of them grabbed me by the collar of my leather jacket and led me to a police car. I didn't know what was going to happen to Peter, I couldn't see if he had succeeded in leaving before being caught, but I really wished he had. If not, my plan would have failed and I didn't like the idea. I sat in the car without resisting, probably because of the rottweiler in the trunk who was staring at me avidly. I was sure they could have used it against me and having my throat sliced by this enormous dog's fangs really wasn't in my plan. They slammed the door and the engine started with a roar. I had no idea where I was going but before I could think about it someone outside caught my attention. A hand on her hip, standing proudly near Broyles, she was looking at me through the window, watching the car I was in slowly pass her by. I felt a twinge of sorrow but I couldn't do any better than look back, my eyes full of tears. I was wrong. She _had_ betrayed me. They all knew how I worked and they had planned I'd have come to try and leave with Peter. It was her fault. She had sold me. I wasn't angry, though, but I felt deeply hurt. I had pull all my faith in her, believing she was on my side. I'd been wrong all along and I was paying the price of my self-confidence.

Half an hour later, the car parked near a huge and gray building. It didn't really look like a jail but it wasn't reassuring either. They led me inside and what I saw made me shiver. I was walking in a long corridor safely kept by three guards at both ends. Some doors were open revealing what looked like giant labs. To experiment on what exactly, I didn't know, but if I was there it probably was because they intended to use me. We stopped two minutes later in front of a large and heavy door and they took off the handcuffs before pushing me inside the cell. There was a bunk, dirty toilets in a corner and a rag of dust covering the whole. The situation couldn't be any worse. I sat on the mattress, silence only broke by noises of drops of water falling on a pipe. The yellow light coming from the single bulb quivered and I thought for a moment that it was gone, but a few seconds later it had come back to normal. Not that I was afraid of darkness, but this cell really was creepy. My hands were cold – _I_ was cold. So I just curled on the thin mattress, put my hands between my thighs to keep them warm and closed my eyes. I didn't know it yet, but I was going to spend five long days here before someone would come.

I woke up with a start when the door opened with a creak. I sat on the hard bunk only to find her standing in the doorway, her shape drawn by the harsh light of the lobby. She entered the confined room and closed the heavy door behind her. She was the last person I had expected to see there so I didn't know what to say. I just stayed there, my mouth half-open with surprise. She sighed and came closer, her mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. It seemed like she was trying to put words on what she wanted to say. She finally shook her head and sat next to me, crossing her hands on her knees. She remained silent for a long time and I didn't want to break the silence. After all, she was the villain of the story, not me. After what seemed to be an eternity, she cleared her throat and turned to me.

'It's not what you think it is.' she said, feeling her intense stare on me. 'I did betray you, but for a good reason.'

'Which is?' I asked, sorrow replaced by anger. 'You promised me you'd help! I trusted you and now I'm stuck here! I don't even know what happened to Peter, what they're gonna do to me! There's no good reason for selling me to them!'

'There is' she whispered, taking my hand in hers. 'I wanted to see you again. And it was the only way without taking too much risks. They believe I'm here to question you. All I wanted was to see you before you left...'

'Because you really think I'll be able to leave now that they've got me!' I almost shouted climbing on my feet. Sorrow had completely gone by now and I felt the anger running in my body through my veins like a dangerous poison. I couldn't believe she was the one behind all of this because _I_ wouldn't have had done it. _I_ would have protected her, because after all she was me. And what's more logical than save yourself? But the fact was that she wasn't like me at all and her logic wasn't the same as mine. That was the only thing that didn't fit in my plan. I blamed her, but not as much as I blamed myself. I should have considered all the possibilities but my plan had seemed so perfect I couldn't have had imagined there was a single flaw. And for that I hated me. I exhaled deeply and turned to face her.  
'You're the flaw' I said, my nostrils dilated and my eyes dark. 'You ruined the whole plan!' My voice was low and loud, and it seemed a bit too loud for her.

'Don't make so much noise!' she said, looking at the door nervously. 'If they realize I'm not here for what they think I am, we'll be both in the same basket!' But I was unable to remain calm and she had to grab me by the shoulders and push me on the bunk before I could do something stupid -like throwing my fist at the door and alert the guardian. Her hand covered my mouth and she lowered her head so as she could look at me straight in the eye.

'Keep your fucking mouth shut and listen to me.' she ordered in a whisper. 'If I hadn't had a plan I wouldn't have let you be captured. There's plenty of ways you can escape and I'm here to help you. Nothing can happen to you when I'm around so don't panic. Understand?' I nodded slowly and she finally released her hold. I couldn't see what her own plan was because it was impossible to get out of this cell without passing by a guard, but I trusted her. An unpleasant silence set even though I waited for her to explain the reason of her need to see me. She had taken a lot of risks by coming here and I couldn't see why it was so important. She was fiddling with her fingers looking straight at the tip of her shoes. I didn't how much time she had, but certainly not the whole day. I was the one to break the silence.

'Why?' I finally asked, her eyes drifting to look at me. 'Why did you need to see me again? After the note you left me I thought you didn't want to.'

'I didn't really mean it. I was scared of what would have happened if we had met again... I don't want to get emotionally involved with you, I have Franck and you're... You're _me_. I don't know what happened the day we first met, or even why, but I just can't get rid of that thing.'

'What thing?' I perfectly understood what she meant because I'd tried to ignore that precise thing for the past few days. For me, it was like a tiger purring in my chest when it was calm, when my thoughts were aimed at anything but her. But when I came to think about her, it was roaring loudly, filling my body with some sort of vibration. For now, it was asleep and I didn't feel it. But I knew it was there, waiting for a sign, waiting for me to lose the control.

'I don't know... Every time I think about you I feel it inside. I've never experienced it before... It's like love, but way stronger.' She stood up and began pacing, fiddling with the hem of her leather jacket. 'I know this sounds crazy, but believe me, it's here. I've dealt with many weird and odd stuff in my life, but this is just too much. I don't know where this comes from, but it wasn't there before, so please we must do something about it.'

'Like what? Tell Mr Secretary that he needs to experiment on us to find out what's happening? No way. And would you please calm down, your anxiousness is infecting me!' She stopped dead in her tracks and turned to face me.  
'So what, what do we do now?' she asked, finally sitting back next to me. 'Do you think it'll leave when you get back home?'

'I have no idea. I suppose so. It's appeared when we met, maybe it's just the consequence of us being in the same universe. '

'What if it isn't? What if when we're both on the right side it doesn't disappear?'

'I don't know, okay? Stop asking questions I have no answer to!' I put my head in my hands, trying to control the wave of anger running through my limbs. I felt the mattress sink and she wrapped her arm around my shoulders.

'I'm sorry,' she said. 'I tend to be a quiz machine when I'm upset.'

'It... It's alright. But please would you... Just stay away from me.' Not that I was feeling anything special but I was scared that _it_ might happen again. She nodded and released her hold, moving so that she was sitting far enough from me.

The yellow light made her hair shine, with a beautiful orange tone... The tiger in my chest stirred. I didn't want to wake it up, but... God she was beautiful. I inhaled deeply, closed my eyes to try and think about something else. It wasn't a selfish thought at all. She was beautiful because she didn't look like me. Her skin seemed soft, smooth. Probably because she didn't take her job as seriously as I did. The anxiousness, the lack of sleep, the fear of doing something wrong... All of this made me look older than her. She hadn't all those small wrinkles in the corners of her mouth, the light in her eyes hadn't disappeared yet, her face didn't look like she'd never laugh... She was way prettier than I was. I should have been jealous. Jealous of her life, because she had done something better of it than I had. Jealous of her, because she could strike friendship with anyone, because she was gorgeous, because she was everything I wasn't. But I just felt defeated. She'd just made the right choices when I hadn't. It was my fault if I hadn't taken the right way. I was reassured in a way. Reassured than a part of me had got on in life.

I was thinking too much... Too much about her. The tiger was awake now, and roaring louder than ever. My hands shaking, I couldn't help but open my eyes back only to find her smiling at me. Even her smile looked brighter than mine.

'I know what you're thinking,' she said, drawing me in a hug. 'But I'm not any better than you...' Her voice was muffled against my shoulder and it took me some time before I could realize what she'd said. She was wrong... She had to be wrong...

'I thought I told you not to touch me...' I whispered, leaning into her embrace. I didn't sound convincing at all and I could feel the tiger in me melting in a wave of affection. She was warm and I felt comfortable in her arms. A tear rolled down my cheek and disappeared in strand of her hair. I needed to hold her close to me, as close as possible. I didn't know why, but the idea of losing her was horrifying. If I let her go, she would disappear and I would never see her again. My fingers clenched on the back of her leather jacket, nails almost tearing the fabric. This time, sex wasn't the way out. This time, I felt like there was no way out. I heard her sniffle and I knew that I wasn't the only one crying. She wasn't any stronger... This time I had to put an end at whatever was happening. I couldn't let anything happen because the both of us would be unable to face the consequences. I knew I had only a few seconds left before there was no turning back. I had to do something right now, but... One. _She's warm and the heat emanating from her body pressed against mine... It feels too damn good to let go..._ Two. _Her fingers dancing up and down my back in a delicate ballet cause me to shiver deeply... It's been such a long time since I've experienced something like that..._ Three. _She buries her face in the crook of my neck and she shifts on the mattress to get closer to me. She needs me... _Four. _I have to let go, but my own arms tighten around her... What if we stay like this forever ?_ Five...

'Agent Dunham, one minute left !' a guard shouted with a loud knock on the door. It had the effect of an electroshock which drew us apart. She looked at me and I could clearly see she was panicked. She took my hands in hers and kissed me deeply before I could know what was happening.

'I'm gonna come back' she whispered in my ear. 'Two days, okay? Hold on for two days so I can prepare everything. I'll make you leave this silly place, I promise.' She kissed me one more time before the door opened. Once outside the cell, she turned on her heels to face me and added :

'Remember, Dunham. I'll get everything I want from you.' The guard was still watching us, so I aimed my fiercest look at her, hoping he wouldn't notice what was really happening. She finally left and I laid down on the bunk, knowing I only had to wait a couple of days before returning home. My eyes lifted to the ceiling, I saw something that shouldn't have been there...

'God' I breathed, quickly getting on my feet. 'Please, open the door !' I shouted, knocking on the door. 'She's left something behind her !' The guard was either too stupid or too naive, but he believed me and opened the door. I didn't wait for him to understand the situation, knocked his gun out of his hand and shot a single time in the head. He fell on the floor and I started running in the same way she'd taken a few minutes ago. Luckily, I had a good memory and I remembered the path I needed to follow to get out of here. I slipped in a bend and I knew I had finally found the way out. She was at the end of the corridor, talking with another guard. She needed to know before he knew.

'Olivia, run !' I screamed, shooting at the guard. I didn't kill him, but he was injured enough not to chase us. I pushed her in her back, taking a quick look behind us to make sure no one was following.

'What the hell has happened?' she asked, breathless as we were running faster than ever to the exit.

'A video camera !' I answered, finally opening the front door. 'I guess that didn't fit in you plan, did it?'

'Not really.' she said sheepishly. 'Sorry I'm not gonna keep my promise.'

'You are. There might be one way...'

'What is it?' she asked, taking the keys of her car inside her jacket.  
'Drive me to Walter's lab.' I replied, slipping inside the car on the passenger seat.

'That lab has been closed for years, what do you expect to find there?'

'Just trust me, okay?'

She sighed but complied, and a quarter later we were parking near the old building surrounded by amber.

_One more chapter to go ! Stay tuned ! :)_


	2. Chapter 2

**N/A : **This chapter is shorter, but there will be another one soon ! :)

Thanks for reading ! :D

* * *

_She sighed but complied, and a quarter later we were parking near the old building surrounded by amber._

The front door was closed but we encountered no difficulties to smash it open, blowing a small cloud of dust. The place was really dark but we didn't have enough to find the switch. Everything was covered with large white sheets protecting the machines, but they had been there for so long I didn't even know if they were still working.

'Okay, try to find a tank, I'm gonna look for a syringe.' She nodded and lifted the sheet covering the nearest machine – which looked so weird that I didn't even want to know what it was. As she carried on, I searched the drawers, the desks, everywhere where a syringe could be hidden. I finally found one that looked a bit dirty, but we were going to have to do with it.

'Have you found the tank?' I asked her, taking the cap off the needle.

'Yeah, I think so. What do we do now?' she said as I joined her.

'Have you got any serious disease?' I asked while rolling my sleeve.

'Huh, not that I am aware of. What the hell are you doing?' she exclaimed as I slowly pricked the needle in my arm, groaning of pain. Using my left hand, I took a good quantity of blood then turned to her.  
'You've never been treated with Cortexiphan, I have. We're supposed to have the same blood, so this shouldn't cause any problem. Without this we're not going to cross over, now come on, show me your arm!' I ordered. She hesitated a few seconds, but she finally extended her arm to me. Very carefully, I injected my blood inside her own blood system, not really knowing if it was going to work. This was the only solution I could think of at the moment and Walter had probably already sent his whole army to get us. I repeated the operation five times until I couldn't move my fingers anymore. It felt like my arm was about to fell on the floor and I was so tired I barely could stand properly on my feet. When I began to vacillate, she was quick to slid her hands under my arms to help me regain balance.

'It's okay' I told her, even though I knew being that weak wouldn't help me cross over. 'Come on, go in the tank.'

She opened the doors and cautiously slipped inside it. I was unable to lift my legs, so I just sat on the edge and let myself fall inside. The water was freezing and I could hear her teeth chattering whereas my whole body was shaking hard. The tank was too small for us to be side by side, so I just laid on the top of her. She wrapped her arms around my waist and, exhausted as I was, I would have loved to close my eyes and fall asleep.

'What do we do now, apart from changing into ice statues?' she asked, her voice resounding strangely on the metallic surface.

'Be scared.' I simply told her, trying to let the fear take possession of me.

'Now, just when I thought this couldn't be any weirder.'

'I'm not joking, this is how it works...' She sighed, but she didn't really seem to want to be scared. Police sirens rang far off and I thought this could trigger her fear. Instead, she just straightened up, trying to figure out how long it would take them to reach us.

'Shit, I haven't taken my gun! If they find use we're dead!'

'Olivia...' I whispered, shaking her shoulder weakly.  
'Not now, please shut up! Do you really want them to know we're in here?'

'Olivia...' I said one more time even though I knew she had decided to do something heroic to save her life. 'I think I'm dying...' I couldn't feel my limbs anymore, even my body had stopped shaking. I couldn't think straight and when she tried to tell me something I didn't hear a single word. I heard a door being smashed in the distance – which was actually only a few meters away – but that wasn't the thing I feared the most. My biggest fear was death and even if my thoughts weren't clear I knew I was going to die. An unusual sensation ran through my whole body and I used the last of my strength to grasp her wrist and whisper in a last breath in her ear :

'Come with me...'

I closed my eyes, knowing that this sensation meant I was leaving this world. The weak aura of life irradiating from me dimmed and before I could entirely realize what death was like, everything went dark.

Cold. That was the only thing I could think of as I slowly regained the control of my body. I was unable to move, it felt like I was trapped in an giant ice cube. I tried to lift my arms but the only result I got was a light sensation in the tip of my fingers. I was aware of nothing but my own frozen body. No sound reaching my ears apart from the loud beating of my heart, no other feeling than the cold paralyzing my limbs, no other taste than salt on my tongue, no other smell filling my nose than rust. Then I realized that I was supposed to be dead. Aren't sensations proofs that you're alive? The single thought came as a bombshell. I quickly opened my eyes but a powerful white light dazzled me and I couldn't see a thing until my eyes got used to this sudden change of environment. The aftershock gone, I noticed there wasn't so much light, after all. The other side was so dark that I had probably forgotten what a real sunny day was like. All I could see was a sheet metal panel that looked a bit rusty -which was actually the roof of the tank. It took me a long moment to finally understand that I wasn't dead at all and that the silence said it all : we had crossed over. Not a single wing flutter was to be heard and I could see the light filtering through the little opening of the tank's doors. I opened the tank and stepped out of it, a pool of water slowly growing at my feet. I sighed deeply, exhausted but euphoric. That was the beginning of new life and this time there would be the two us. I turned to help her get out of the cold water but I suddenly realized that she hadn't moved for a while. Hadn't even said anything. Hadn't even whispered... That triggered a huge fear inside me and the tiger got out of his den, all its senses under alert. I leaned forward to look inside the tank and my eyes grew wide with a mix of surprise and horror. I hadn't heard her because she simply wasn't there. No Olivia in the tank. She hadn't crossed over with me. She'd stayed over there. For a moment I didn't know how to react. Cry? Shout? Let myself die? I had no idea what to do in such a situation, so I just stood there, looking blankly at the dark water. I needed time to assimilate the information, but when I did it came as a great shock. _I would never see her again. _It seemed so absurd at that time that I just could accept it. I closed the tank's doors, then opened them back, as if she would have appeared in it just by magic. It didn't work the first time so I repeated the same operation, every time more frantic, over and over again, until my arms were sore. With a cry of rage I slammed them one last time and I began pacing, fulminating. There must have been a reason why she hadn't cross over with me. A good one. Maybe she had forgotten to take something very important and she was going to cross later. Maybe she had decided to wait a little to make sure they wouldn't try to follow us. I knew the most logical explanation was that she had been caught, or worse, killed. I was trying hard not to think about that possibility but a dreadful vision occurred to me when my eyes landed once again on the blasted tank. Her, lying in a deep red water, her leather jacket torn by bullet holes. I shook my head, trying to ignore this nightmare view. I was about to call Walter to tell him find a solution to get her back when the door open quite violently. Peter seemed to be highly stressed and he headed to the small office, his fingers trembling. I would have wanted to call him, let him know that I was there but there was no use. He had already seen me. He stopped dead and blinked, as if he couldn't believe his own eyes. But then his face split in a smile and he exhaled deeply, clearly relieved. He almost ran to me and drew me in a hug which left me breathless. I hugged him back because it was the only thing that I felt comfortable doing. I didn't know why but the feelings I used to have for him were faded. It probably was because my mind was elsewhere, focused on her.

'Olivia, how did you...?' He didn't finish his question when he noticed the tears in my eyes. I should have been happy because everything was back to normal, me and Peter together, safe in our world. But without her, it didn't feel right. She had become way too important for me and knowing that she probably was dead in another universe didn't help me to feel better.

'Olivia, what's wrong?' he asked, and I could hear the concern in his voice.

'I... It's just... Everything's wrong.' _Because nothing can be right in such a situation_. I judged that it was unnecessary to tell what was really on my mind because I knew if I had he would have thought I had been knocked on the head pretty badly.

'Olivia, it's fine!' he said, stroking my back. 'I know you've been through a lot and it's not gonna be easy to get past that, but I'm here now, okay?'

''Kay', I answered, the sound of my voice muffled against his shoulder. The last thing I wanted right now was to have a long conversation so I decided not to ask him how he had got back home. That would be a story for another time. I patted his arm with a smile and wiped what was left of tears on my cheeks. I really needed to be alone so I wouldn't blow the semblance of smile that probably looked like a grimace.


	3. Chapter 3

_I really needed to be alone so I wouldn't blow the semblance of smile that probably looked like a grimace_.

I walked past him, unable to look into his eyes, and headed to the parking lot. My clothes were almost dry but I wanted to change into something a little more comfortable. I always brought a sweatshirt and a sweatsuit in the trunk of my car in case something happened – even though that wasn't the type of situation I had thought about when putting them in the bag. Unfortunately, I hadn't realize the key worked on batteries, which had drowned in the water of the tank. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes, hoping I would wake up from this never ending nightmare. The only thing I could do was to go back to the lab and ask Peter if he could lend me some of his clothes I knew he kept in Walter's little office. When I came in, he was on the phone so I waited patiently until he put it back I his pocket.

'Can I borrow you a shirt and pants, please?' I asked softly, my voice just loud enough to be heard.

'Sure' his answer was, and he lead me to a cupboard in the office. There was a large pile of clothes, from tee-shirts to socks but I didn't even wonder why he needed so much pants in the lab. I chose a black shirt which was twice too large and black jeans. I noticed he grinned, probably because I hadn't lost the habit of dressing with dark colors, but he didn't make any comment and left without a single word. I slowly took off my red-tee-shirt – _her_ red tee-shirt. That was her tee-shirt I was holding in my hands. I turned my head to the mirror Walter had bought for an experiment and froze. It felt like I was looking at her through that mirror. Of course, I knew it was only my reflection, but just for a moment, I pretended it was her. Olivia, with her long, dark red hair falling on her shoulders and her green eyes looking straight into mine. I smiled and she smiled back, and I somewhat felt relieved. That was a dangerous game I was playing and I perfectly knew it, but I needed to savor these very last moments I could spend with her. I came closer to the mirror, tears of joy and pain rolling on my cheeks. I put my hands on the cold surface and closed my eyes. It was easy then to imagine it really was her hand I was touching, and I could almost feel the heat of her hand enveloping mine. I was going to miss this. The sensation of her skin against mine, and her breath on my face. I could count on Peter for these moments of intimacy, but it would never be the same intensity again. With her, I felt overwhelmed and safe, but with Peter... When he had hugged me I had only felt _good_. There was nothing special about him anymore because I had found someone even more special. The more I thought about her the more I wanted to get through that mirror and hold her tight against me. I needed to feel more than her hand. My forehead pressed against the cold and I couldn't help but kissed the mirror. Softly, just like a butterfly landing on a flower. My lips fitted perfectly on hers and the mirror returning my breath added a bit of realism to this dream. And, just like in a dream, I was interrupted by Peter who had probably came in to make sure everything was alright. He didn't know how alright I was until he burst in.

'Olivia, what the hell are you doing?' Of course, for someone who didn't know half of the story, that probably looked strange. But I didn't think that was a good reason to sound this shocked and look this disgusted, so I just shrugged, taking the shirt on the table and slipped it on. He sighed heavily and before I could make a move he picked up the red tee-shirt that had fallen on the floor.

'I'm gonna take these with me too' he said, pointing out my pants and jacket. 'They need to be washed.' The way he treated this tee-shirt – like it was nothing but a dirty piece of rag – made me quite angry. It was her tee-shirt after all. The only thing left that could reminisce me of her. It deserved to be treated with a little more respect.

'Give it back to me' I ordered, tugging at the hem of the red fabric.

'Come on Olivia, don't be this childish. Just change into those pants and let me wash your clothes.'

'I'm not being childish and these clothes aren't mine. Give me this fucking tee-shirt, Peter.' He had always been stubborn and he didn't seem to want to let go so I pulled harder to the point the tee-shirt couldn't resist and was torn to pieces. I looked at the scrap in my hand wide eyed, not really realizing what had happened. I didn't know this type of clothe could be torn that easily, but on second thought I remembered that one of the effect of traveling between universes was a molecular damage of everything that wasn't human. But that didn't explain why I had reacted like that and Peter seem to understand something really wrong was going on.

'Olivia... What's the matter with you ?' Peter said, putting what was left of the precious piece of clothing on the table. 'Olivia, look at me!' But I couldn't hear what he was saying, only the sound of the beatings of my heart was filling my ears. That terrible noise usually drove me insane, but this time it helped me control the wave of anger rising in me. I ignored him and crouched near the cupboard, holding the tee-shirt against my chest. The tiger was on the verge of exploding and looking at him would have made it worse. I thought that stupid feeling would have left with her, but it was more present than ever. And_ it_ didn't seem to make a difference between her and what belonged to her, and tearing that tee-shirt felt like _she_ had been hurt. I was ashamed by my own behavior. Ashamed because I could not control those feelings I knew were not completely mine. Ashamed for being that mad about a simple red tee-shirt. Peter was right : this was childish.

'I'm sorry' I whispered, staring at the floor. 'It's just... I can do it myself, I don't want to bother you...' I knew he wouldn't believe such a lie – he wasn't stupid, he had realized that something had happened over there and that Olivia had something to do with it, but he just wouldn't acknowledge it.

'You'd better put this on before you get cold,' he simply said, handing me a pull-over. 'Then I'll take you home.' I nodded and he left without a word. I needed to pull myself together before the tiger compelled me to do something I didn't want to. That tee-shirt wouldn't have changed my life, after all. And if I wanted I could probably buy the same here. There wasn't anything special about this one except it came from another world. That was it. It was so not me to make such a fuss about such a trivial thing. I shook my head and unbuckled my belt, wanting to get rid of these clothes as fast as possible. I feared that keeping them any longer on me would have triggered another crisis and that really wasn't something I wished happened. I changed into the black pants, laced my shoes and rolled up the sleeves of the pull-over which were way too long for my arms. I left her clothes behind and closed the door after me. Peter was sitting on a stool, waiting for me.

'Does that bother you if we wait a little here?' he asked when he finally saw me. 'Walter and Astrid are coming, I want to make sure he doesn't experiment on himself once again.'

'And why would he do that?' I knew it wouldn't be the first time, but I thought he had given up the idea after Peter had threatened him of banning every candy from their cupboards.

'To get you back, of course. His latest idea was to inject himself with Cortexiphan when I declined the offer. We've all been working hard to get you back, Olivia. I hope you realize that.'

'Of course I do,' I replied, not really knowing what to do. I felt that getting to close to him would seem a bit too out of place, but on the other hand I wanted to thank him and words weren't strong enough. So I decided it would be better if I got closer and see what he expected me to do.

'What happened over there?' The question burst out of his mouth like he wanted to ask it before it got stuck in his head forever. Maybe he wasn't expecting me to do anything at all, after all. 'I mean... Come on, you've just come back!' he said, standing of all his height in front of me. 'Is being sad and disappointed your way to show me everything's back to normal? I thought you wanted us to be together and... Now we're here and it's like you don't want anything anymore!'

I perfectly understood what he meant but I didn't have an answer to his question. I would have loved to say that I was truly happy to be back, that I was just an after-effect of crossing over, that I really wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. And after what I told him in that flat over there, that would have been logical. But the very truth was that I wasn't happy, that I would have preferred to stay over there with her, that I didn't want to live my life with him because I wouldn't be able to fulfill his desires. If I told him the truth, I would be moping all my life, alone, and drown in my sorrow. But if I chose to live a lie, then my life might be a little better. The problem was that if Peter found out about it, he would never forgive me. And that would lead me once again to the first option. In both cases, it wasn't worth living. The poor Peter was looking at me, waiting for me to say something, but my head was buzzing with thoughts and I was unable to decide.

'I want to be with you, Peter' I said,the words coming out of my mouth before I could stop them. Option two wasn't that bad after all. Now that she wasn't there and I was going to live with him, maybe I could find a way to love him like before? I had fallen in love with him for a good reason, maybe all the feelings I used to have for him were just buried deep, hidden by this stupid tiger sleeping in my chest. Maybe I just needed time to recover, and to forget her. Yes, I had made the right choice. I would do my best to make him happy because he deserved to be so.

'I want to be with you and I'm really glad to be back. I just feel a little... Weird.'

'Weird enough to kiss a mirror?'

'Peter, I...' I noticed he was smiling, and I felt somewhat relieved. I didn't want to give him an explanation right now, because I would have had to explain everything from the very beginning and I wasn't in the mood to debate about what had happened. 'I'll explain everything, I promise. Just, not now.'

'It's okay' he said, sliding an arm around my waist. 'We have all the time we want, now.' I closed my eyes, trying to feel. It only took a few seconds, but when I Peter put his lips on mine, the tiger beat a retreat. I knew I had won a battle. Not the war.

It's getting longer than I'd have expected it to be ! :)

I hope you like it, and feel free to review ! :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_I knew I had won a battle. Not the war._

Indeed, I could hear my conscience screaming '_victory!_' in my head, but it was suddenly disturbed by a weird noise. My heart missed a few beats when I realized it was coming from the tank. It only lasted a few seconds and then it stopped, as if it was only a figment of my imagination. Peter must have felt my muscles tighten because he pushed me back lightly, his fingers clenched on my arms. He was about to say something when the same noise echoed through he room, and this time he heard it too. He frowned, trying to find the source of it, and when he finally turned his gaze on the tank I knew I hadn't dreamed. Before I could entirely realize what I was doing I rushed to the tank and opened the doors, not really knowing what to expect. On the spur of the moment I had thought that it was her, alive and healthy, and that she would have gotten out of this tank smiling. And that single thought had made me feel better, because I knew that with her everything was going to be fine, that all of my problems would be reduced to nothing. I wouldn't have to lie anymore, I wouldn't have to live with a man I didn't love, I wouldn't have to hide my real feelings. Except that this sweet dream was becoming a nightmare in front of my eyes. The usual green color of the water had turned to a deep red and her body was floating, lifeless.

'Olivia?' I asked, the joy I was feeling moments ago vanishing in a black hole. 'Olivia, come on! You did it!'

I knew there was no hope, that she would answer me, but on the other hand I still wanted to believe she was alive, I still wanted her to take my hands so I could help her get out of there. But she didn't react at all and it took me some time before doing something cleverer than standing there like an idiot. I grasped her by the wrists and drew her out of the tank as delicately as I could. I laid her down on the floor, trying to feel her pulse, but my fingers were trembling so much I couldn't figure out if there was one or not. I lowered my ear to her mouth, hoping she was breathing, but I couldn't here a single blow. Of course, it would have been a miracle if she had survived, but with all the tings I had seen in my life this time I really was willing a miracle to happen.

'Please, I can't lose you twice! Come on!' I crossed my fingers on her chest and began pressing her ribcage – crushing would be more appropriate – as hard as I could. I closed my eyes tightly, unable to look at her pale face and glassy eyes. If she died, it would be my fault, I just couldn't let this happen. I heard Peter coming but I didn't pay any attention to it. The only thing I wanted right now was her alive. I pinched her nose between my thumb and my index and blew some air in her mouth, but there was no response.

'Come on, dammit!' Tears of anger and pain were rolling on my cheeks, my arms were weakening and she still hadn't shown any sign sing of life. 'Peter, go get towels!'

'Olivia, what the hell...?' I knew that was Peter and I felt him got closer to us. That probably looked weirder for him than I could imagine but this was not the time for an explanation. I just kept on massaging her chest, begging under my breath for her to wake up.

'Olivia,... I think you can't do anything for her...' Peter said, putting his hands on my shoulder. I ignored him even though I was feeling the muscles of my arms screaming of pain.

'Peter, go get those damn towels! Come on baby, wake up! I know you can do it!' My whole body was shaking and I really was on the verge of giving up. I pressed one last time and fell backward on my bottom, having lost all my strength. Seeing her laying there, lifeless, had been the most terrible experience of my whole life. For a few seconds, I just stared at her body, unable to realize she was dead. Peter finally got back with the towels, and he put them on a chair. He handed me one so I could wash the blood from my hands but I wiped the bloody water away from her face instead. I could feel the tears in the corner of my eyes, blurring my vision, but I just couldn't let her now how weak I was. Peter put his hand on my shoulder and crouched in front on me.

'You'd better sit there' he said softly, pointing out a seat. 'You'll be more comfortable.' I nodded even though I hadn't really understand what he had said. I was a little disconnected from reality and it didn't even shocked me when Peter took her in his arms and laid her down on an autopsy table. I was unable to detach my eyes from her corpse and it was only when Peter threw a sheet over her body that I blinked, chasing what was left of tears in my eyes. He then sat next to me and I lowered my eyes to the floor, not wanting to meet his intense stare I was feeling on me. I was expecting him to ask tons of questions – because I knew what he'd been a witness of was not a thing he'd ever seen – but he just wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

'I'm sorry, Olivia...' he whispered. I was grateful he didn't ask for an explanation and when he draw me in a tight hug, I burst out in tears. The tiger inside me was crying, deeply hurt, but not as much as I was. The sorrow I felt had nothing to do with _the thing, _because inside me I perfectly knew I care about her much more than I would have ever admitted to anyone. I blamed myself because it was the only way to ease my pain. I'd never experienced a sorrow like this and I doubted that telling someone about it would have done me some good, but the urge of avenging her death was too important. If I could have asked Peter to hurt me, I certainly would have. The thing was he would have never accepted to hurt even if I begged him to. That was the worst situation I had found myself in ever. I was responsible for her death and I would never be punished for it.

'It's my fault, Peter' I said against his shoulder. 'We should go to the police and tell them what I did.'

'Olivia' Peter said, sounding a bit worried for my mental health. 'It's not your fault. She crossed over alone, you didn't force her to do it!'

'Yes I did! And I didn't give her enough of my blood and that's why she didn't make it! I should have given her more!'

'Olivia listen to me,' he said, lifting my chin so my eyes could meet his. 'There could be a thousand other reasons why she couldn't pull through, okay? It is _not_ your fault.'

I agreed with a nod because I knew there was no need to argue when he used that particular tone of his, even though I was convinced I was right. Of course, being wounded had probably had an undesirable effect, but you can't die this fast with an injury like this. I hadn't given her enough Cortexiphan and she had paid the price. I got on my feet, suddenly feeling the need to be alone. I needed to think. To think about what my life would have been like if she'd survived, about what I was going to do now all of those little plans I had done in my head were not going to happen... To be honest, I couldn't quite imagine my life without her. Right after meeting her, I'd known we were going to have a very particular relationship. There was – had been – a really strong bound between us, stronger than between twins. I didn't even know if it was love but that feeling was so extraordinary I thought I was going to miss it a lot. I wiped my eyes with my sleeve and I was about to leave when Walter and Astrid appeared across the room.

'Peter!' he called, hurrying to his desk. 'I may have found a way to get agent Dunham back!'

'I'm already here, Walter' I said with a quick sign of the hand, avoiding his look.

'How amazing! How did you...'

'Walter, not now' Peter interrupted, knowing I didn't really want to elaborate. I was sick, cold and utterly dejected, and the only thing I wanted was to crawl into bed and sleep for the rest of my life. I walked past them, unable to look into their eyes. I ignored the body laying dead under the sheet because I knew I wouldn't bear the sight, but of course Walter couldn't help and hastened to her.

'And you've brought back a body from the alternate universe! Maybe I could study it to find out what the consequences of traveling between universes are!'

Before I could anything, I heard a loud thump which caused me to turn on my heels. I didn't know I could be that violent towards Walter, but seeing the mass of white fabric and her foot jutting out from under the sheet drove me mad. I rushed to him and grasped him forcefully by the collar of his white coat.

'Had nobody told you to treat dead people with some respect?' I roared, shaking him harshly. 'You are not going to experiment on her, am I clear enough? I won't let this happen, Walter!'

I was hoping he would have got the message quickly, but he wasn't even looking at me. I was about to shake him once more when I noticed he seemed fascinated by what was happening behind me. I released him, leaving a trace of blood on his collar, and looked over my shoulder to see what was so interesting. My heart missed a few beats when I understood. The sheet was moving. It was so slight that I wondered a moment if this was for real or not, but a second later there was a cough. Then her hand slipped under the sheet.

'Could someone please help me get this off of me?' she asked with a really weak voice, trying to free herself.

For a moment, I just stayed there, wide eyed. It was so crazy that I really thought I was dreaming.

'Hello?' she then said, and I could feel the hesitation in her voice. 'Anybody here?'

I blinked and suddenly everyone seemed to wake up. I knelt next to her and lifted the sheet, not really knowing what to expect – she'd been dead for a good quarter, after all. My heart was hammering against my ribcage and it only calmed down when I saw her deep green eyes looking back at me.  
'They're gone?' she asked, ready to faint.

'Shh, don't speak baby,' I said, tearing her shirt. Now that she was alive again, the wound was bleeding more than ever, and it wouldn't be long before she passed out. Astrid was already calling the hospital and Peter hurried to Olivia's side, pressing a thick towel on the wound.

'An ambulance is coming' Astrid said, putting her phone back in her pocket. 'They'll be here in five minutes.'

I barely listened to her, focused on what I was doing. I didn't want to do something wrong, I knew what it would feel like if she died a third time, and I really didn't want it to happen. This time she had to stay alive, whatever it cost. I was rolling another towel to put it under her head when Walter knelt next to me.

'Agent Dunham, the ambulance isn't far, now, you should hide.' he said in my ear, grasping my wrist.

'Walter, what..?'

'If they see you, they're probably going to ask your name. You can't tell them you're Olivia, because this Olivia has no health cover! You have one, and trust me you'd better let them believe she's you! Not to mention that if they find out there are two of you, they'll do research and they'll realize there's a problem! You can't take the risk!'

'I... I hadn't thought about that...' I said, realizing he was right. 'Okay, over there they've got a '_show me_' card. Do you think it could do it? I haven't got my ID with me.'

'No, the card you're talking about doesn't exist here, it's not a proof. Go get your card with Peter, Astrid and I are staying with her.'

'Walter, I...'

'If you want her to stay alive you have to do it! I'll be waiting for Peter at the reception. And be quick.'

I nodded, took a last look at her body and followed Peter who had already put his coat on and was waiting for me at the door.

* * *

I honestly didn't think this story would be that long, but I hope you still like it ! ;D


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5  
**

I walked into the FBI building quickly, knowing I needed to find my boss as fast as possible. The hospital had now my ID and before I could have it back I would have to be very careful. I couldn't drive my car, take my gun with me... and soon realized that I couldn't get inside to see Broyles either. The woman of the reception had seen me so many times that I thought she would have let me in without any questions, but it seemed that she didn't recognize me. Maybe it was because of the hair, or the clothes, but I probably looked like some kind of intruder as she called the two gorillas of the security to come and help me out of there.

'It's okay,' I tried to tell them while they were gently but firmly leading me to the entrance. 'Agent Broyles is expecting me! Please, I really need to talk to him! Could you just lend me you phone please, I can call him if you want!'

I had thought I'd never see such a cliché, but they looked at each other, scratching their heads, wondering if this was a good idea or not. One of them finally handed me his cellphone and I was quick to dial Broyles' number.

'Hello, sir' I said when he finally answered.

'Dunham? Where the hell are you?' He sounded utterly astonished, I could hear it in his deep voice.

'They won't let me inside because you have my ID. Could you please do something about it?'

'How on Earth did you get back? Doctor Bishop said he hadn't found a way to help you cross over!'

'I'll explain it all if you come right now. They're about to kick me out, so please hurry!'

'I'll be here in a minute.'

He hang off and I handed the security agent his phone back.

'Agent Broyles is coming.' I told them, and they finally nodded and got back to the corners of the vast hall. When the doors of the elevator rang, I was surprised by the way my boss was dressed. Of course, the last time I saw him he was wearing a 'Fringe Division' hat, jeans and a khaki jacket, but when he stepped out of the elevator in his black suit I realized he looked much better this way. I didn't remember him smiling – I always wondered if he even knew what it meant- but the large grin he had when he saw me revealed much more of his true feelings than the cold 'Dunham' he greeted me with.

'Sir' I replied with a nod, unable to contain my own smile. He shook his head, putting a large hand on my shoulder, and leaded me to the elevator.

'Agent Dunham, you'll always surprise me' he said as the doors closed on us. Two minutes later I was sitting in a large seat in front of him, a glass of whiskey in my hands. I wasn't thirsty and drinking alcohol probably wasn't a good idea only a few hours after crossing over, but I didn't want to thwart him and took a small sip.

'So, how did you come back?' he finally asked, his hands crossed on his desk.

'We went to Walter's lab from over there, into the tank and that's it. You know you need to be scared if you want this technique to work, but we were chased by Walternate's army, so that part was pretty easy.'

'What do you mean, _we_?' he asked, frowning his eyebrows.

'Well, I know this in going to sound pretty weird, but I didn't come home alone. I had to bring my alter-self along.'

'You mean the other Olivia's here too? How is that possible? What about the balance between universes?'

'Yes, she's here too, I gave her Cortexiphan and it worked. I don't know why because that chemical substance is supposed to work only on children, but it worked, that's the essential. As for the balances between universe, well, there's been two Peter in this universe for twenty-five years and the two worlds haven't collided yet, so I guess one more Olivia shouldn't cause serious issues.'

'Why did you bring the other you with you? She's supposed to be our enemy, isn't she?' He sounded truly perplexed and I totally understood. I was supposed to be at war with her, kill her if necessary, and in the end I saved her.

'There have been some unexpected events and I somewhat _had_ to help her. I couldn't let her die. I'm not going to tell you what happened over there so don't bother asking. The only thing I can tell you is that she is not going to betray us and that she should help us a lot. She's lived over there for more than thirty years, she knows a lot about that other universe and it could help us find a solution to save both worlds.'

He nodded and opened one of his drawer, picking up my FBI badge.

'Welcome back, agent Dunham' he said with a small grin, handing me the plastic card. 'You've done a great job.'

'Thank you, sir' I replied, putting it in my pocket. 'But that's not the ID I wanted from you. Now there are two of me in this world, I'm gonna need another ID, with another name. I gave Olivia mine because she had to go to the hospital, and that means that for now I have no identity. Could you something about it? I'm sure you have some relations who can help, right?'

I'd have expected him to answer 'Yes, of course, no problem', but on the contrary he sighed deeply, looking away through the window.

'I have relations indeed. But creating an identity means creating a whole life and that's quite hard to do, if not impossible. No one has ever seen her, everyone would ask dangerous questions. You've never mentioned a twin to anyone, that would look to weird.'

'What if I say she's been under the government protection? That could work, couldn't it?'

'It could, but there's no logical explanations. Why her, and not you or your sister? Even if we find something that could explain it all, can you image imagine the number of documents we'd have to create? A false birth certificate, a false medical file, a false identity card! That's too much work to be done. I'm sorry Dunham, but this is not going to be possible. You're gonna have to share your identity with her.'

'Sir, with all due respect I don't think you realize what this ID means for me. For us. If we have to share my ID we won't be able to have a decent social life, and it'd be way worse for her! I work five, sometimes six days a week and honestly, I think she'll go crazy if she can't leave my apartment for more than one day out of seven! Please you have to do something!'

'I'll see what I can do but I don't promise anything. Even if they accept to do it, it's going to take a long time. You don't create a life in a blink of the eye.'

'Thank you sir,' I said, knowing there's was still hope. 'Now if you don't mind, I'd like to go to the hospital.'

'It's not safe to go without your ID. You'd better wait until they let her leave.'

'I have to. I'll be careful.'

I was sure none of the doctors would notice if I didn't anything that could draw heir attention. They had a lot of other things to care about and checking a visitor's identity probably wasn't important compared to saving one's life. When I arrived in the hall, I asked the security guard his phone so I could call Peter. I couldn't take my car and he would have to lead me to the hospital. He parked a quarter later in front of the building and I was quick to sit next to him and close the car door.

'So, how did it go with Broyles?' he asked, stopping at a red traffic light. 'Can he do something about this ID?'

'He said he would see what he can do, but apparently it's not going to be easy and it's gonna take a long time.'

'He likes you, I'm sure he'll find a way to fix this.' he said with a slight smile.

'I hope so,' I sighed, fiddling with the button of the radio to turn it off. Not that I didn't like the music but silence felt more appropriate than the loud beats of a rock song. We weren't far from the hospital now and I felt the anxiousness slowly creeping in my stomach. I had no idea how she was and I didn't in what condition I was going to find her. On one hand I didn't want to ask Peter because I feared his answer but on the other hand I wanted to know what to expect. I tried to convince myself that she had talked, that she had looked pretty fine apart from that bullet wound, and that meant she was actually going to be fine. But she'd been dead for quite a long time before rising from the dead and that probably had an undesirable effect on her. I shook my head and when Peter finally parked near the hospital I felt the need to grab his arm before he could get out.

'Peter, how is she?' I asked, my voice trembling slightly. 'I don't want to go in here only to find out she's gonna die tomorrow.'

'Relax, Liv', she's fine!' he answered, patting my shoulder. 'Of course it's gonna take a few days before she can sign out, but she's gonna be fine. Doctors even say they're surprised because it's healing pretty quickly. There's nothing to worry about, I promise.' I nodded, relieved, and we headed to the entrance. I was feeling a bit nervous and it became more and more stressful when we entered in the hall. Peter was on the look out and I kept my head down, walking straight to the elevator. We had almost reached it when I felt Peter drawing me to him, my face crushing on his shoulder.

'Pretend to be sad' he whispered, his strong arm around my own shoulders. 'Hi, doctor Swift!'

he said, . 'How's Olivia?'

'Oh, she still hasn't woken up,' I heard him say, unable to do what Peter had asked me. I'd always been terrible at acting and if I tried to sob it would probably sound like everything but a sob.

'She's stable, though. Nothing to worry about,' he added before shaking Peter's hand. 'You can cheer up, ma'am' he said, probably talking to me. 'Everything's gonna be fine!'

'Uh uh,' I answered, nodding against Peter's shoulder, trying to sound as convincing as I could. Peter said goodbye to the doctor and I finally was able to breathe properly as the elevator doors closed.

'That was _so_ pitiful, Liv,' Peter said with a laugh. 'You really should take some theater lesson one day.'

'Shut up Bishop! Maybe if you hadn't try to suffocate me I could have said something better than 'uh uh'!'

Peter shook his head, still laughing, and when we stopped behind Olivia's door he became all of the sudden serious. I frowned, disturbed by this change of behavior; and I was about to ask him what was wrong with him when he shushed me lifting his hand in the air.

'Before you go in here you have to promise me something.' he said, a hand on the handle.

'Okay,' I said, a bit worried.

'Tonight, you come tom my place and you tell me everything. I'm not blind, nor stupid, something happened with her and I want to know exactly what. Promise me you'll do that for me.'

It took me some time before answering. I trusted him but I knew if I told him the truth he would not appreciate it. I had crossed over to get him back because I loved him, I just couldn't tell him I had come back with an alternate version of myself I loved more that him. Now that I knew she was alive and kicking all the plans I had prepared in my head would become true. Unfortunately, none of them included Peter. I would have to think about all of this. I would have to decide whether I loved Olivia as a friend, as a sister or as a lover. Maybe there still was a chance with Peter if I realized I love her like a sister or a friend. But if I wanted her to live with me like a wife... I didn't want to hurt Peter, he seemed to want this relationship as much as I had had. He had put his faith in me, I knew he loved me and he probably believed I loved him too. I was the one who wanted this in the first place, I couldn't betray him and tell him I didn't want to live something with him anymore. I would have to lie to him.

'I'll be there.' I said, feeling a pang in my stomach. 'Now can I see her, please?'

He nodded and opened the door, and when I saw her lying in that bed, surrounded by white, it felt like all my problems had flown away. The Peter issue wasn't important anymore because now I knew I didn't love her as a friend. Nor as sister. Not even as a lover. I loved in a way that no one before me had ever experienced. The feelings I used to have for Peter weren't worth half of what I was feeling right now. There was no doubt left. I was going to tell Peter because in any case he would find out about this. I didn't want to make him feel any worse. I had to tell him everything. I wouldn't lie to him.

* * *

Total lack of imagination for this chapter, hopefully the following one will be better ! :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6  
**

I closed the door behind me and instead of running to her and take her into my arms like I had expected me to do right before entering, I just stood there, unable to make a move. Something had struck me but at the moment I quite didn't know what. I felt a mix of surprise and shock in my stomach and it had the effect of a heavy punch directed right on my belly. It took me a few seconds to pull myself together and then I realized. The sound of the heart rate monitor was loud in my ears, almost deafening. I just didn't care. There was one, that meant she was alive, and that was enough. I realized I had felt surprised because she looked _fine_. I didn't know what I had expected before coming in here. I just hadn't expected _that_. No pipes, no oxygen mask, no anything. She could have been sleeping in her bed it would have looked exactly the same. Before being taken away by the ambulance, she'd been dead for a good quarter and I honestly didn't think someone could recover this fast from death – I even hardly believed it was possible to actually recover from death and I had to pinch me to make sure it wasn't dream.

'I swear to you I am alive,' her voice came softly from the bed. I froze – not that I had been particularly agitated – and looked at the reddened skin of my hand where I had pinched myself.

'How did you...'

'I felt it' she said in a whisper, showing me the back of her hand then letting her arm fall weakly on the mattress.

'Oh...' That probably wasn't the best word I could have said, but it was the only one that popped in my mind. I suddenly felt uncomfortable and it was only when she pointed out a chair with her chin that I finally dragged it on the floor next to the bed so I could sit beside to her. I knew what her next question would be and _that_ was what was making me anxious. I slipped my hand in hers and smoothed her palm softly, looking at her pale face.

'How are you feeling?' I asked, trying to save some time before the fateful words would come out of her mouth.

'Exhausted' she replied with a loud yawn, her eyes half closed. 'But given the circumstances, quite fine I'd say' she finished with a smile, trying to rub the sleep from her eyes. 'You?'

'Oh, well, fine. Do... Do you remember what happened?' I asked, deciding it would be better if I cleared things up quickly instead of beating around the bush for hours.

'Everything is a blur,' she answered, frowning like she was trying hard to reminisce how she got in that bed. 'We were in the tank because you needed to flee. I can't remember anything else. So where am I?' She straightened and even though she knew she was too tired to do anything more, she tried to push herself up on her elbows. I helped her sit against a pile of pillows, and I hesitated a few seconds before answering.

'We... We left,' I simply said, watching out for her reaction, more anxious than ever. On the spur of the moment she'd told me it was the best thing to do if she didn't want to get killed and I'd thought it was the best thing to do too. I just hadn't realized that meant she wasn't going to see Franck anymore, that she was going to live in a totally different world where no one knew she existed and she probably hadn't thought about that either. Maybe she didn't even remember that she wanted to cross over with me? Maybe if I told her she was in my world she would think I had forced her to come and she would hate me forever? I had already experienced what it felt like to lose her and if it had to happen once again I'd be so broken I thought I would never recover from a pain like this. I even wondered if that stupid tiger would survive. Another option was to made her believe she still was in her world, just like in that movie, 'Goodbye Lenin!'. But that was impossible and I knew it. I had to tell her, not matter how she would react. I had lied to Peter, I couldn't lie to her too. My heart sank in my chest when she finally ask the question that sounded like a death sentence in my ears.

'We've crossed over, you mean?' Her voice was now reduced to nothing more but a whisper and she laid back down, closing her eyes. I would have wanted to do everything I could to justify myself, to convince her it hadn't been my fault, that she had had to come if she didn't want to die, that it had been her only way out. My brain was working fast to find a solution and after a few seconds, I finally found the only answer that could lead to the truth. Fate had to decide, not me.

'Yes, we've crossed over' I answered, pushing a strand of red hair away from her face. The only thing I could now do was to wait for a sign. My fingers clenched on her hand and I kept staring at her face, hoping she would smile or say something reassuring. But waiting was above my forces, I had to know before leaving. I bend over her and wrapped my arms around her, my chin on her shoulder.

'Please...' I breathed in her ear, tears rolling my cheeks. 'Don't tell me you regret this...' I shook her lightly, not wanting to hurt her more than she already was, and closed my eyes tightly, waiting for a simple word that would prove me she was happy to be here with me. I had never been patient, and for me her silence meant everything. She would never want to talk to me anymore and the single thought was unbearable. I wanted to hear her voice so much, even if she wanted to say she hated me, even if she wanted to scream at me, even if she wanted to cry and blame me. I just needed to know how she was feeling.

'Please...' I repeated, my cheek pressed against hers. 'Please, say something... Anything...' I closed my eyes tightly, trying to contain the tears that were falling helplessly, and tightened my grip on her. I finally felt her hand on my hip, but no sound came out of her mouth. Did she do that to push me away, or on the contrary draw me to her, I couldn't tell. I heard the door open, and then Peter telling me that we had to go, but I didn't move. I wouldn't move until she said something to prove me I was right.

'Olivia,' Peter sighed. 'We really have to go now.' I didn't listen because I didn't care. All I was waiting for was a sign, a word, and it would take more than stupid rules to make me leave without that damned sign.

'Come on Olivia, please...' I begged, stroking her soft hair without thinking. 'Anything...' Peter grabbed my arm, and at the same time she finally did something. My lips stretched in a large smile as she lifted her chin and kissed my jaw softly, her hold tightening on my hip. Joy was bubbling in my stomach and I bit my lower lip, trying to avoid a sob of happiness. I hugged her tightly and kissed her back, feeling Peter's inquisitive look on me. I stood up, rearranged the sheet on the bed and kissed her one last time on her forehead.

'I'll come back soon' I told her, putting the chair back against the wall. 'You need to rest, you should be able to sign out in a few days.'

She nodded weakly as I closed the curtains, and I eventually followed Peter who looked quite disturbed. He kept avoiding looking at me until we got in his car.

'What?' I asked, letting myself fall on the passenger seat. 'You said it yourself, you knew there was something between her and I.'

'I just didn't know what!' he exclaimed, running his hand over his face. 'I didn't expect something this weird! What the hell happened over there? I'm sorry, but I won't believe I've just seen you kissing... Yourself, until I know why!'

'Okay, then take me home and I'll tell you everything. I don't want to lie to you Peter, you deserve the truth.'

He nodded with a sigh and twenty minutes later we were in my living-room, none of us daring to speak. The silence was uncomfortable, oppressive, and being home wasn't of any help. It felt like I was back in that little cell, observed, alone. Peter was in an armchair, his hand covering his mouth, his eyes looking at the brown carpet on the floor. For a moment I could have sworn he was about to say something, but after a few seconds I realized it was only my imagination. I crossed my hands on my lap, wanting to ease the tension, but I didn't know what to begin with.

'What do you want to know, Peter?' I finally asked, judging it would better to tell him what he wanted to hear.

'You and I, it's over, isn't it?' he asked in a strange tone, as if he already knew the answer. 'You came back for me, so I guess you loved me. But you fell in love with her. I don't count for you anymore. The moment I saw you in the lab I knew something had changed.'

'Peter you count for me,' I said calmly, knowing things might degenerate quickly. 'But you have to know that what happened between Olivia and I... It's not normal. We didn't want it. I still love you but... I love her more. I don't think I've ever loved someone that much.'

'What do you mean exactly with '_love_'? The way you're talking about it, it sounds like you could sleep with her and you wouldn't mind!' he said, getting up from the armchair, looking rather angry.

'We already did it Peter,' I said in a breath, ready to get up in case he became violent. He always had had a quick-temper, and telling him this had probably hurt his self-esteem. I preferred to anticipate his moves rather than being sent to the hospital with a broken jaw.

'What?' he bellowed, aiming his angriest look at me.

'I slept with her over there. That's how it began. We were fighting on the floor, and then we both felt it. And it's still there,' I told him, a hand on my chest. 'Believe me, if I could get rid of it I would.'

'I don't believe you,' he spat, opening the cupboard and taking the bottle of whiskey he had bought me. 'I saw you with her, I know you wouldn't even try to change anything. You disgust me.' he finished, swallowing a large gulp of the amber drink.

'Peter, please,' I said, knowing I had already lost. 'I know how you feel, but you have to know I didn't want any of this to happen!'

'Bullshit,' he said, taking another gulp. 'You fucked your alter-self once, maybe more, you liked it, didn't you? You so liked to fuck _you_ that you want it to happen again. Incest doesn't bother you as long as you it does you some good, right?'

'Don't you dare saying that Peter!' I exclaimed, threatening him with my finger. ' She's _me_, I don't see why you call that an incest! You don't know anything about what happened and if you could feel what I'm feeling for her, if only for a minute, you'd know I'm not lying! I swear I love you, but I don't want to be with you because I know every time I'll be in your arms, or in your bed, I will think about her!'

'Oh, that's so sweet of you!' he said, ironic. 'You don't want to betray me, right? It's too late sweetheart. You betrayed me the moment you put your lips on hers.'

'She's me, I can't cheat on you with myself, can I?' I said, not realizing it could trigger his rage. He charged at me and cornered me so I couldn't escape his hold. He put his hands against the wall on each side of my head and lowered his face toward mine with a dark look. My whole body shivered when he exhaled deeply, filing my nose with the smell of alcohol and mint. I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the fear I felt growing in my stomach. I held my breath, unable to say anything, and his forehead finally touched mine.

'Tell me you don't feel anything...' he whispered before kissing me deeply. I kissed him back because I knew that I could not deny what I felt for him. When I said I still loved him, it was true. I had fell in love with him before meeting Olivia, and even if the love I used to have for him was faded, it was still there, hidden somewhere. It was the only way to prove him that I wasn't lying : letting him do whatever he wanted to let him know I trusted him. I should have resisted when his hands slipped on my shoulders, then on my chest, to finally land on my hips. I should have resisted because I knew he wasn't totally himself and he was doing this only to hurt the feelings I had for Olivia. All he wanted was to heal his pride, he didn't care about me, nor about what I wanted. He didn't need my opinion because he wanted to take control. So I didn't resist.

* * *

I don't know if I should make the next chapter M or not, but one thing is sure, it won't be the last one ! :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7  
**

His fingers fiddled a moment with my belt while his other hand slid under my large shirt, his nails scratching my bra. My pants fell at my feet, quickly followed by my panties, and my eyes closed when his hot tongue licked my jaw from the chin to the ear.

'Tell me she's better than me...' he said lowly, rubbing his palm between my legs. I moaned, unable to resist, and I put my hands on his cheeks to kiss him deeply. He lifted me from the floor and I wrapped my legs around his waist, my fingers drifting on his strong chest. Of course it felt good, really good even. My hands moved to his waist so I could unbutton his jeans, but she crushed his pelvis against mine so as to block my wrists.

'She hasn't got a dick, has she?' he groaned in my ear, his lips closing around my lobe. 'I wouldn't want... To be favored.' I moaned louder and bit his lip as his finger gently went inside me, his thumb tenderly stroking the most sensible spot.

'Peter...' I whispered, my hips moving against his hand to accentuate the pressure on my sex. That was a normal reaction, and I knew it, but inside my head I was trying hard to convince me that it was because he was actually better. But I also knew that this didn't feel half as good as when Olivia did it to me – except it hadn't been her hand rubbing against me. I would have wanted to stop him, tell him that this meant nothing and that it wasn't because he was making love to me that I would love him more. I grasped his jacket forcefully and my toes curled in my shoes as a second finger joined the first one.

'Peter, please... Stop,' I breathed, burying my face in the crook of his neck. All I could think of was her, and her delicate hands on me, and I feared that her name might escape my lips at any moment. I had never felt this torn apart inside, torn between the love I had for him and the love I had for her. With Peter it had taken a long time before those feelings had grown inside me, because that's how it normally works. You meet someone, spend time with them and see what happens. That was the kind of love I had believed in, until I had met Olivia, that is. It hadn't quite been love at first sight, but more like love at first touch. On the spur of the moment I hadn't realized it, taken away by this fabulous wave of intense pleasure, but now that I came to think about it I knew that the tiger was born the second her hand had brushed against mine. The more she had touched me, the more it had grown in my chest. The more she had kissed me, the stronger it had gotten. And now that she was touching me and kissing me again, it was more awake than ever. None of this was natural and it would have never happened if I hadn't left this world to save Peter.

'Peter...' His name echoed in my brain, getting me back to reality for a instant. I shook my head, my heels digging into his butts. She wasn't kissing me, it wasn't her, it couldn't be her, but... _Oh god, Olivia... Don't stop... _Her face was floating behind my closed eyes and I just couldn't help it. I was doing my best to make it go away, to imagine Peter's calloused palms over my body – which should have been easy because it was actually him caressing me – but it wasn't working. The tiger believed it was her and there was no way I could control it. I put my hands on his cheeks, feeling his stubble under my fingertips, but even that didn't convince that stupid beast purring behind my ribs. His features, his short hair, everything else that made a man out of him, felt so strange under my touch that my brain couldn't tell the difference and brought me irreparably back to _her_. Her nails scratching my back, and her hands on my thighs, and her hot breath on my face, and... _Oh yes, right there... Faster..._ A moan rose down my throat as I finally felt that very pleasant sensation running in my veins and the heat slowly growing in my lower belly. But there was something wrong, it didn't feel like when it _really_ was her making love to me. Something was missing and soon I realized that it was her presence. What else could it have been? Everything felt like her but it wasn't having the same effect on my body. It didn't react to Peter's touch because he lacked something she had. I didn't know what but I couldn't think about it any longer. The intense wave – still far less intense that the last time – ran through my limbs and disconnected my brain from reality. I didn't know what I was mumbling but inside I was praying that it wasn't Olivia's name. I bit my lower lip, trying hard to come back to Earth, but it was too late. A few seconds later, Peter dropped me nonchalantly on the floor and crouched next to me.

'That felt good, right?' he breathed in my ear. 'I wouldn't have thought she could be that good.' I stood up and before slamming the door, her turned on his heels.

'If you want to love me, then go and talk to Walter. Maybe he can find a solution to your _problem_.'

He said the last word like he knew I thought it wasn't a problem but a chance. And I truly believed it was a chance. I was the only one on the whole world who had experienced such feelings, it wasn't easy to think the contrary. Now I had to face the most terrible dilemma of my life and I had absolutely no idea which side I was on. Peter or Olivia? Peter... Because I wanted to be with him and I always had had. But Olivia... She haunted my thoughts, every time she crossed my mind I felt utterly overwhelmed and I just couldn't live without this constant bubbling joy in me. I suddenly felt like crying because I realized that I just couldn't chose. If I chose Peter, that would mean abandoning Olivia and that was impossible. Now that she was here, I intended to make he feel safe and loved, and going with Peter didn't fit in that plan. If I chose Olivia, I knew Peter would do his best to make my life living Hell. I shook my head, trying to contain my tears, and got on my feet. Before thinking about all of this more deeply I needed to have a shower. I couldn't bear Peter's large pullover on my shoulders anymore, my whole body was covered with white trails of salt and my hair felt so dry that touching straw would have felt exactly the same. I grabbed the clothes on the floor and headed to the bathroom, my legs sill a little trembling. I turned to hot water on and took towels in the cupboard. I undressed quickly and stepped in the shower, hot drops cascading over my shoulder. It was way too hot and a few seconds later my skin had turned to a deep red. I didn't care, all I wanted was to relax and wash all this dirtiness away. Steam filled the whole room and soon I couldn't distinguish my own feet. The heat felt heavy and my eyes closed by themselves, exhaustiveness crushing on me. It had been quite a while since I had last slept but with all that had happened I hadn't had the time to rest. My arms felt like filled with lead and I laid my forehead against the tiling, unable to contain a loud yawn. I didn't build the courage to take the bottle of shower gel and just stayed like this, inhaling the vapors of the boiling water. I don't know how long I stood there but when I finally wrapped a towel around me, deciding that I couldn't spend the whole night under the water, darkness had had the time to spread over the city. I directly headed to the bedroom and let myself fall on the bed, not even taking the tie to slip into more comfortable clothes. I drew the comforter to me and rolled myself in it, realizing that I really should have done that more often. Sleeping in the back of the lab whenever I got the time wasn't worth a full night of sleep. I sighed of contentment, wanting to savor this as much as I could before I would have to make up my mind.

My cellphone rang, drawing me out of my dream, and I started mumbling threats to whoever was daring to disturb the only moment of peace I had had for ages. I picked my phone up the bedside table and tried to avoid looking at the aggressive light of the screen.

'Hello?' I grunted, rubbing my hand over my face.

'Hey,' someone whispered, sounding a bit afraid. 'I can't stay long, we can't use phones after midnight and I'm afraid it's not going to be long before they find out about it.'

'What are you talking about?' I said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

'Well you know, they're supposed to trace phone calls, I don't want them to know who I'm calling. If they find out about you we're dead.'

'Huh, hospitals do not trace phone calls here. A t least not when nothing serious happens to a patient, or anything like that. Is there something wrong?'

'No I... I miss you, that's it. I was just wondering... Is everything fine with you?'

'Of course, everything's alright sweetheart...' I said, thinking it would be better if I didn't tell her about the Peter issue. 'Do you know when you can get home?'

'Tomorrow if everything's alright.' she replied quickly as if she had heard someone coming.

'Okay, well... I'll ask Broyles to collect you, I'll be waiting for you here.'

'Right, see you tomorrow then. I have to go, I'm sorry... Good night.'

'Good night to you too...' I whispered, knowing she had already hang off. I sighed deeply, staring blankly at the wall hidden behind a curtain of darkness. To be honest I wasn't expecting her to leave this quickly. I wasn't prepared to live with her yet, not to mention that we were going to have to share the same bed – not that it would bother me much, but I didn't want anything to happen for a while, at least not until I had decided whom I'd chose. I put my phone on the mattress and laid back, my eyes wide open. Once I was awake there was no way I could get back to sleep and I perfectly knew it. I repeated the conversation we'd had to myself, over and over again, trying to decipher what I had felt when hearing her voice. The little something in my stomach which I couldn't quite describe... My heart pounding against my ribcage... If those weren't signs of love then what could they be? There was no way I could ignore all of this just to be with a man I wasn't sure I loved anymore. The thing was I wasn't sure she loved me either. Love and being loved in return, that was what I wanted. But she hadn't said 'I love you' before hanging off. Aren't you supposed to say this kind of things when you truly love someone? I shook my head and put my hands on my ears, trying to stop thinking. _Love_... The single word was echoing against my skull and it really was starting to make me sick. _Do I love Peter, does Peter love me, does she love me, do I love her_... I didn't know anymore and I wrapped my arms around a pillow, hot tears flowing on my cheeks. _She_ had brought too many problems... All of this would have never happened without her, everything was her fault, not mine. I needed to get rid of her and that ridiculous tiger that was ruling my life. The faster they would both disappear, the faster things would come back to normal. I would do what Peter had asked me. I would go and see Walter. And I would find a way to get her back to her universe. I sniffled and picked my phone up, dialing Peter's number. It took him a few seconds before answering and judging by his tone, he probably hadn't been sleeping well either. I took a deep breath, tried to ignore the feeling of guilt rising in me and I finally told him.

'When do we get started?'

* * *

Sorry for the delay, I've been quite busy ! This chapter is shorter, but I promise the next one will be longer ! :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8  
**

When the doorbell rang, I jumped from the couch, my heart racing in my chest. It felt like all the efforts I had made in the evening to try and convince myself that everything was going to be alright were reduced to nothing. My fingers trembling slightly, I took a few seconds to control my heavy breath and finally opened the door. She was standing next to Broyles, and even though the tiger told me to rush to her and hug her tightly against me, I simply took a step back to let them in. She probably noticed that I wasn't truly myself and that I put all my energy in dominating the beast, because she didn't seem really at ease. She crossed her hands behind her back and lowered her head, looking straight at the carpet to avoid my look.

'This is _your_ file, agent Dunham' Broyles told me, handing me a white folder. 'You'd better read it, just in case. I have an arrangement with a friend, you should receive a new identity card in a few weeks. Do not thank me now, Dunham.' he interrupted me as I opened my mouth - to tell him that it wasn't necessary anymore, not to thank him, but he couldn't know. 'I want a complete report of what happened over there on my desk in two days.'

'Of course, sir,' I replied with a nod, judging that it would be better not to talk about that in front of Olivia.

'You don't have to come to work for the rest of the week. You need to rest.' he said, turning on his heels.

'Oh no, that won't be necessary. I need to go to the lab anyway. Something urgent to take care of.' I explained quickly, not wanting to elaborate. He shrugged and tightened his scarf around his neck.

'As you wish. Take care agent Dunham.'

'You too, sir.' I sighed heavily when he left, and closed the door behind him, not knowing how to react now that I was alone with Olivia. The last thing I wanted was to make her feel uncomfortable and unwelcome, otherwise it would be much harder to convince her that we needed to let Walter experiment on us.

'So,' I said cheerfully, trying to sound as natural as possible. 'I've prepared you a little something to eat in case you're hungry. Tonight you can have my bedroom, I'll sleep on the couch. If you need anything else...'

'No thank you' she replied softly, stroking her forearm, looking a bit embarrassed. 'I'm just a bit hungry.'

'Okay, then you can sit here and I'll come back in a minute.' She nodded with a light smile and I headed to the kitchen, muffling a sigh of relief. It would be much more difficult to act as if nothing had happened than I first thought. I shoved the plate into the microwave oven and leaned back against the fridge, massaging my temples. I had no idea how I was going to explain to her the reasons why I wanted the _thing_ to disappear but what I feared the most was her reaction. What if in the end I was wrong and she really loved me? What would I do if she begged me not to make _it_ leave? Would I be able to resist? Probably not. I was weak. It had already been extremely hard to control the wave of satisfaction I had felt when she had appeared on my doorstep, I couldn't even imagine how hard it would be when I would be sitting a few feet away from her. Or maybe I could just drop the plate on the table and lock myself up in the bathroom until she went to sleep? I shook my head, knowing that was the most childish idea I had ever had. I needed to talk to her seriously and I would, no matter the consequences. The loud beep of the oven drew me out of my thoughts and I inhaled deeply to give me some courage. _W__hen you've got to go, you've got to go_. I grabbed a dishcloth and took the burning plate from the oven. Maybe I should pour some poison in it? She would die, the tiger would die and then all my problems would be fixed. I shook my head and grimaced, disgusted by myself. I tended to forget that I was the one who had brought her here – admittedly to save her life, but also to serve my selfish intentions. My heart missed a few beats when I finally entered the living room, and the tiger began to pace impatiently.

'There you go,' I said, putting the smoking pastas in front of her. 'I'm sorry, this is the only thing I can cook without setting my kitchen on fire.'

'That's another point we have in common' she laughed as I sit next to her. 'Franck...' she stopped a moment, her smile fading lightly. 'Huh, Franck is a good cook. He wanted to teach me but I never had the time...' she finished, lowering her eyes to hide her tearful eyes. I quickly looked away, staring at the wall to concentrate on something else that the pain I felt rising in my stomach. I crossed my hands on the table and cleared my throat, knowing we needed to talk about something else if I didn't want to take her into my arms and comfort her.

'So, huh, did the doctor give you any recommendations, or anything?' I asked, venturing a look toward her. Bad idea. Very, very bad idea.

'No, he said that I'm perfectly fine.' she answered, her voice sounding suddenly distant. 'Why?'

'Oh,' I said, hypnotized by the sauce on the corner of her lips. I bit the inside of my cheek as the tiger purred of satisfaction. Her mouth looked so appetizing, I just couldn't detach my eyes from it. The thing inside me was screaming '_kiss her_', but if I did so there was no hope left. I would fall for her once again and there was no way I could come back from it. She finally swept the sauce with her tongue, and even though I knew the effect it had on me was not the fruits of my personal feelings, I was forced to admit that this was the most erotic scene I've ever seen. The way she had licked the sauce, the way her teeth had bit her fleshy lip... It probably wasn't intentional but it had looked very sensual. And enticing. I squirmed slightly on my chair, just enough for my foot to slip from the chair rung, and I jumped quite violently with a ridiculous high-pitched cry of surprise. The fascination I had felt vanished, and from the look in her eyes and the grin she bore I knew she had noticed I had been staring. It took me a few seconds before getting back to reality and understand that I hadn't answered her question. I blinked and I couldn't help but blushed when she cleaned her mouth with a napkin insistently, looking quite amused.

'Because,' I said, more embarrassed than ever. I was embarrassed because she knew she had seduced me – not that she had been planning on doing it – she knew I had quite enjoyed it and she knew that I wouldn't put an end to all of this for anything. Or at least she probably believed so. Just like I believed I really wanted the thing to disappear. I shook my head, deciding that it wasn't the time to consider the situation all over again, and wiped my sweaty hands on my pants. She would hate me for giving her false hopes, and I mentally prepared for the hurricane I felt coming.

'Because tomorrow we need to see Walter. He can help us with... All of this.' I finished, my throat dry.

Her fork stopped halfway between the plate and her mouth, and she slowly put it back on the table, drips of sauce falling on the table.

'What do you mean?' she said lowly, her fingers grasping the edge of the table. I sighed deeply, feeling her anger emanating from her whole body. Actually, it would be much worse than a hurricane.

'I mean that I want to get rid of that thing so I can be with Peter, okay?' I said quickly, trying to remain as calm as possible. I could see she was struggling not to get up and rush to me, I could almost feel the tension in her limbs, and I knew that no matter what I would do or say, the damage was done. What I didn't know was that her words could be this painful to hear.

'I abandoned Franck for you,' she eructed, spitting her venom. 'Franck, whom I have loved for more than six years. The man who wanted to marry me, who wanted children with me. And you... You don't want me anymore just to be with your sweet little Peter?'

'I saved you!' I exclaimed, feeling her anger infecting me. I would have wanted to fight against it but the more I tried to, the more angry I was. 'You can't blame me, I saved your fucking life risking my own!'

'If it bothered you that much then why didn't you just let me die?' she bellowed, suddenly standing up, knocking the chair over. A magma of rage was bubbling inside me and I did the same, clenching my fists forcefully. I thought I had never seen this look on her face and I knew that it wouldn't take long before words wouldn't be enough. Her eyebrows were so frowned that I couldn't define where they met, and her whole face was so constricted that I wondered whether she would be able to open her mouth or not. The tiger was roaring loudly in my chest and for the first time I was glad it was here. It was the only thing able to push me beyond my limits, and if Olivia and I had to fight then I would really need it.

'I should have! Now I realize that I really should have!'

'Bloody bitch!' she breathed before dashing toward me. The impact was violent and I fell backward, my head knocking hard on the floor. Stars danced in front of my eyes for long seconds and when I finally was able to focus on her face above me, I saw her fist splitting the air and crushing my nose forcefully. Pain and rage melted in the same wave rising in me, and I jumped on my feet, pearls of blood flying all around me. She didn't seem afraid – even though I knew the look on my face had never been this terrifying – and she succeeded in dodging my powerful blow directed on her face. She grabbed my shoulders and I felt her knee hitting my stomach forcefully which left me gasping for air. She was getting the upper hand and if I didn't regain my self-control I probably would end up at the hospital. The problem was that I was tired, my arms felt weak and the beast wasn't helping me as much as I would have wanted it to have. Probably because it knew that inside I didn't want to fight against her. She was right, I was a bitch for wanting to abandon her. She had been through a lot of things, the past two weeks had been awfully hard, and the only thing I was doing was to make her life even worse than it already was. I was supposed to be her guide, I had promised her that I would help her to feel safe in my world... And in the end, all I could think of was to be with Peter, even if that meant sending her to a long and dark corridor she would not be able to come back from. Little by little, I felt disgust replacing anger inside me – I was disgusted by myself, disgusted by my selfishness, disgusted by this behavior I knew didn't fit me. I opened my eyes, trying to tell her that I regretted what I had said, but before a word could come out she grabbed me by the shoulders and threw me on the table. I closed my eyes tightly and protected my head with my arms when I realized she was brandishing the vase above her. I just had the time to roll on the side before the glass broke into thousands of pieces right where I had been a few seconds before.

'Olivia, please listen' I tried, creeping toward the door. 'It's okay we don't have to do it! Please, calm down!' But from the look in her eyes, she didn't seem to want to stop at all, and when she grabbed a chair I realized that there was no way I could stop her by myself. I jumped on my feet and ran to the door as fast as possible, and I was able to close it behind me before she could knock me out. I heard the loud crush of the chair on the wood, and I was glad she hadn't thrown it at me.

'Open that damn door!' she barked, trying to turn the doorknob. 'I'm not joking Olivia, open it now!'

'Just calm down, okay?' I said, my hands holding the handle tightly. 'I didn't mean what I said and I regret it. Peter can wait, you're more important than him for now. We don't have to go and see Walter tomorrow, understand?'

'So you're a bloody bitch _and_ a bloody liar?' she screamed, giving the door a heavy kick. 'You can't do that to me! Without me both you and Peter would be dead by now! You saved my life, cool, but don't forget that I saved yours too!'

'I know that Olivia, for God's sake calm down!'

'No, I won't calm down!' she bellowed, finally letting go of the doorknob. 'Over there there's a man grieving because of you, you could have at least some consideration for him, shit!'

I heard a muffled cry of rage and I jumped when she kicked the door forcefully one last time. After that, nothing. The silence was heavy, too heavy, maybe. I was expecting her to come back screaming a flow of insults and trying to smash the door down, but nothing. I prick up my ear, wondering what she was doing, but the only thing I could hear was the distant purr of the cars in the street. For long minutes I remained silent, sitting against the door, paying attention to every little noise coming from behind the door. At least, she didn't seem to be breaking every piece of furniture and every trinkets of my apartment. I waited half an hour because I didn't know how long it would take before I could get back in without her running toward me to try and pull one of my eye out. After another hour, I finally got on my feet, thinking she probably had controlled her temper. I sighed deeply, wondering for a moment if it was a good idea or not to go inside. I wasn't sure how she would react when seeing me and the last thing I wanted was another war in the middle of my living-room. I shrugged and finally opened the door. I could always leave once again if she was still mad at me. First good sign, she wasn't waiting for me behind the door and didn't rush at me. I took a few careful steps toward the living-room and stopped dead when I saw her sitting on the couch, her face buried in her hands. I could feel her distress and at the same time the worry of the beast, and the mix was kind of depressing. I cleared my throat to let her know that I was there and she looked up, trying to wipe the tears from her cheeks before I could see them.

'Hey' she said softly, rubbing her nose on the back of her hand – thing that I did very often too, I realized.

'Hey' I replied, putting my hands in my pockets. I hadn't thought about what to say, hoping words would come easily once I would be in front of her, but the only thing I could think of was '_Don't stand here like a figurehead and do something._' I slapped myself mentally and my body finally reacted. I sat next to her, and as she didn't resist I dared to wrap an arm around her shoulders. She was trembling slightly and from the ill-being coursing through me I understood she was on the verge of bursting out into tears.

'Listen' I said, stroking her back tenderly. 'I'm sorry... I... We're not going tomorrow. We're going to wait until... Until you feel fine here. I know it's going to be hard and that it'll take a long time, but I just want you to be happy, okay?'

'No', she sniffled, drawing her legs to her chest and putting her head on my shoulder. 'We really should get rid of that thing while there is still time. Besides, Peter's not going to wait. He needs you.'

'Olivia... I don't think a week or two would make any difference.'

'We don't know. The thing's been here for two weeks, maybe it's already too late... If you want to do it then... We'd better go tomorrow. Even if the thing's not here anymore... That doesn't mean we won't see each other anymore, right?'

'Of course not!' I said, not believing she could doubt me. 'I've never been a fan of those girly things, but we can go shopping if you want. Occasionally have a coffee... Not to mention that Broyles is probably going to offer you a job in my division. Oh, and we need to find someone for you, don't we?' I asked with a smile, tenderly stroking her arm. 'That means we're gonna need to hang out on the week-ends so you can use your seduction power, and you'll have all the men you want at your feet.'

'I'm not so sure about that' she laughed, finally wiping her tears with the back of her hand. 'But it sounds great.'

'Yes, really great even.'

I felt so relieved that in the end we had come to an agreement, and the bubble of joy was swelling so much in my chest that the smile splitting my face became contagious. Her eyes were shining with a gleam that I've never seen before and she pushed my shoulders gently to escape my hold. I caught her wrists and sat on her lap, wrapping an arm around her neck.

'You know,' I said lowly, a hand on her cheek, my thumb brushing against her cheekbone. 'I think that we should make the most of this... While there is still time.' Her smile broadened and she slipped her fingers in my hair as I slowly bent toward her, my lips finally meeting hers for one of the most memorable kiss of my existence.

* * *

I've got a lot of exams to prepare for May, and this is probably the last chapter before June ! :)

I hope you still like this story ! ;D


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 (M)  
**

I was sitting on a chair in the middle of the lab, Walter questioning me over and over again. He was pacing back and forth right in front of me, scratching his chin absently, and it really was starting to get on my nerves. Peter standing a few feet away from us, his hands crossed on his chest, and Olivia absorbed in the contemplation of her nails weren't helping at all.

'That's really tricky,' Walter stated, finally pausing.' Can you tell me precisely how it all started?'

'I already told you, _I don't know_.' I replied with a heavy sigh. 'It just... Happened. I don't know why or how, but one thing is sure, I did not want it.' I said, giving Peter an intent look.

'Oh, well, I might have a theory. Astro!' he called through the lab, snapping his fingers impatiently. 'Bring me six Q-tips, a milk-shake and some muffins! I can't work with an empty stomach!'

Astrid nodded and she disappeared for a moment in the office before coming back with some test tubes, a glass of Walter's favorite drink and small white box full of cakes.

'Would you please sit here, my dear,' he said to Olivia, and she quickly let herself fall in a chair next to me. 'Oh, and take off your tee-shirt.'

She gave me a questioning look and I shrugged, not knowing where this would get us. We could never know what was running in Walter's mind, anyway. She did as she was told, but she didn't feel quite at ease and was trying to cover herself with her arms.

'Okay, what now?' she asked with a shiver while Walter was handing me an oxygen mask.

'Now you just need to get aroused,' he said very seriously. 'And _you_ need to put this on. I wouldn't like to witness what could become an orgy in the middle of my lab.'

'You're kidding me, right?' Olivia said, apparently thinking it was a joke. 'I'm not doing this here.'

'Oh but you have to if you want me to find a cure.' Walter said, lifting his eyebrows.

'Maybe it'll help if you tell us your theory' I tried, thinking that the only reason why she didn't want to comply was she didn't know what Walter's intentions were.

'Haven't I yet?' he asked, surprised as usual. 'Oh well, I think that both of you release some kind of pheromones in the air. And as you are the same person, you produce exactly the same molecule that fits perfectly into the same enzyme of the same enzyme substrate complex you both have. That is something theoretically impossible, and that is probably why no one has ever experimented on such a reaction. My guess is that if you produces enough pheromones', he explained, showing Olivia, 'then _you_ will inhale the molecules which will inevitably find their enzyme. That is responsible for the production of proteins which trigger a sexual and affective attraction. Sexual activity increase the production of pheromones, that's why I need you to get aroused. Then, I'll be able to collect some molecules in your sweat and develop a substrate of substitution which should fill in the enzyme before the pheromone does. Is that clear enough?'

Olivia turned to me with a pleading look as if the scientist was speaking chinese, and she looked so pitiful that I would have wanted to stop this ridiculous experiment and find another way to fix things. But on the other hand, I believed that Walter was probably right – at least his supposition didn't sound as fanciful as usual – and both her and I wanted to get rid of the thing. We couldn't miss an opportunity like this, even if that meant doing things like that it front of everybody. I smiled lightly to encourage her, forgetting that the mask was now covering a great part of my face, and she smiled back. The corners of her lips were shaking slightly though, and her fingers trembled a little as she slowly unbuckled her belt. I stopped breathing, wondering whether I would feel something or not. At least the tiger hadn't woken up yet, that was a good sign. I lifted my thumb and she nodded before slipping her hand in her pants. I exhaled deeply, a thick cloud of steam escaping my lips. Nothing. I felt nothing apart from the intense heat of my breath reddening my cheeks. I was starting to believe that Walter was right, that those pheromones were the ones responsible for all of this, that it wouldn't be long before he would find a cure and that we would finally be able to live a normal life soon. Unless Olivia wasn't willing to help...

'I'm sorry, I can't.' Olivia said, quickly retrieving her hand from her pants. 'It's not working, I just can't do this here, with all of you staring at me.'

I sighed heavily and took the oxygen mask off, wiping the moisture of me face with the back of my hand. All my hopes shattered into thousands of pieces because she was too shy to do such a trivial thing as masturbation in front of grown up people – as if none of them had seen what sex looked like in their lives. I grabbed the test tubes with one hands and Olivia's wrist with the other, and turned to Walter.

'Where do you want me to rub these Q-tips?' I asked him, ignoring her whispers ordering me to let her go.

'Oh, well, first the armpits, and then any other part of the body covered with sweat should do nicely.'

'Okay, give me ten minutes, fifteen at most and you'll get what you need.' I finished, dragging Olivia behind me to the little office. I put the test tubes on a chair, careful not to spill the solution with the Q-tips, and then pushed her against the table.

'Are you sure you want to do this?' she asked, a bit tensed. 'Peter is right behind that door, maybe we shouldn't...'

'Just shut your mouth and try not to make too much noise.' She nodded with a suggestive look and kicked off her shoes , while I was tugging on her pants to take them off. I swept the files that were laying on the table with a quick movement, and lifted her delicately so she could sat on the edge. Her breath was already shallow, and she clasped my shoulders forcefully as her panties finally joined the small pile of clothes on the floor. I could feel her excitement in my own limbs, but I tried not to pay any attention to it – the last thing I wanted was to realize that it felt too good to give it up. She slipped her hand behind my neck, and drew me to her, her legs wrapping around my waist. I kissed her deeply, my fingers tracing a burning path on her back, until they reached her firm butts stuck against the wood. She moaned against my lips as my left hand cupped her breast, my thumb stroking her nipple playfully, and my other hand slid tenderly on her thigh. I was struggling to keep my eyes open, because I needed to concentrate on something else than the heat rising in me. I watched her face as my fingertips brushed against her folds, her mouth half-open, her nostrils dilating, her eyebrows frowning... She was so beautiful... Her teeth scratched my lower lip when one of my fingers found its way inside her, and her heels dug into the small of my back. The position was uncomfortable and I couldn't do much more. Only, we were running out of time and I needed to find a way to reach my goal more quickly.

'Lay down' I ordered in a whisper, climbing on the table. Her red hair spread around face, like an angel surrounded by an aura of fire. I propped myself on an elbow, one of my leg intertwined with hers, my eyes still examining the small wrinkles that appeared on her face when my hand caressed her flat stomach smoothly, traced a way downward and finally reached her sex. I knew that I shouldn't be too gentle – with six minutes left that was something I couldn't afford – and my finger roughly went back inside her, followed by a second one, my thumb pressing against her sensible spot. Her back arched a little and her toes curled on a sheet of paper – I just hoped it wasn't the warrant I had waited for three weeks.

'Come on, baby,' I whispered in her ear, my nose pressing against her cheek. My wrist was seriously beginning to ache and the muscles of my arm were weakening rapidly. It wouldn't take long before I would give up and the last thing I wanted right now was to use my mouth. 'You're gonna have to help me.'

'Okay,' she moaned with a nod, panting. She lifted her hips a little and that allowed me to rest my forearm, and she also put her hand above mine so that I didn't have overdo it. Her nails dug in my skin, drawing blood to the surface, and her waist began to undulate, loud groans escaping her mouth. I tried to hush her, she was way too noisy – I didn't want the others to hear anything of what was happening or I wouldn't be able to look at them straight in the eyes for an eternity – but there was no way she could control her whimpers and I perfectly knew it. I could feel she was close, because the tiger was purring with all its strength behind my ribs, and because the wave of heat I was now used to was slowly creeping in my veins. She bit her lower lip and her hand pressed harder against mine, she was doing her best to not let the feeling overwhelm her but she didn't try hard enough. She was writhing uncontrollably and the only solution I could think of to prevent the table from collapsing was to roll on top of her. She finally wrapped her legs around my waist, my fingers still deep inside her, and I knew this was the last beeline. She moaned something almost incomprehensible that I didn't catch at first, but when I felt her inner walls contracting with an intensity I didn't know could be this powerful I understood. My eyes grew wider when I saw her mouth opening and her eyebrows frowning in a way that was saying it all. I kissed her deeply, hoping it would suffice to muffle the scream I knew was coming, but unfortunately it didn't work. It resounded loudly against the walls of the office and there was no way the others could have _not_ heard it. I sighed deeply, already imagining a mortified Peter behind that door, and Walter's grin, the one he always bore when he got what he wanted. I slowly got on my feet, my legs a little trembling, and I cleaned my fingers on a rag while she took a moment to catch her breath and compose herself.

'Okay,' I began, taking the test tubes on the chair. 'Can you lift your arm, please?'

'Do you think this is gonna work?' she asked as I rubbed the Q-tip on her skin. 'I thought only males had pheromones in their sweat.'

'Yeah, me too,' I replied, pushing her hair away from her neck. 'But I trust Walter. I know his methods aren't really orthodox, but most of the time they work. And he's the only who can help us, isn't he?' She nodded in acknowledgment, and I finally finished taking the samples Walter needed. She dressed quickly, her legs still trembling a little, and I built my courage up before pushing the door. I froze when I realized that Peter wasn't there. I had expected him to be disgusted, looking at me with all the resentment he was feeling, and if it had been the case I would probably have been petrified. But as much as I hated showing how weak I could be, in the end I had rather liked him to give me one of his hateful stare than to be gone. Peter gone, I couldn't guess what his true feelings were, and that was even more terrible to face. I could deal with a Peter screaming at me, with intense blue eyes riveted on me, with whispers of disapproval slipping insidiously in my ears. I could deal with a lot of things, but not with a Peter gone. I wanted him to finally understand that none of this was our fault – which should have been easy because there were scientific proofs – but I also knew that he could be a real stubborn when something was bothering him, particularly when that something was a lesbian affair between the woman he loved and her alternate version. I shook my head to get rid of those thoughts and I cleared my throat before handing Walter the test tubes, trying not to look too ashamed – because he and Astrid _were _actually staring and I only noticed it when Olivia pushed me in the small of my back.

'I hope this is what you need' I said, wiping the sweat of my hands on my pants. 'I'd rather not... Do this again.'

'Oh, don't worry' he smiled, already putting his latex gloves on and turning his microscope on. 'If I'm right, everything should go back to normal by the end of the week for you two.'

I felt really relieved, it was good to know that it would be all over soon. I only wished Peter was there because he would never believe it if I was the one to tell him. There was a long moment of silence only troubled by the sound of Gene chewing half-heartedly her hay and Walter's mumbling. Olivia finally put her hand on my shoulder, her fingers gently pressing my tensed muscle.

'Maybe we could go for a coffee?' she asked softly.

'Yes' I replied, knowing there was nothing more to do but wait. 'The cafeteria is open, if that's okay with you.'

'Sure' she nodded with a smile, already heading to the exit. I followed her with a sigh, not entirely sharing her enthusiasm. The only thing I could think of was Peter, and what would I tell him when I would see him again. And unfortunately, that moment would come sooner than expected...

* * *

I finally managed to finish this chapter ! :) I'm sorry, I tried not to put mature content in this, but I just had to ! ^.^

I hope you still like it, because I have plenty of ideas for the next chapters ! :) (and there probably will be a lot of them!)


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10  
**

I pushed the door of the cafeteria with my foot, a coffee in each hand, and scanned the room to find a unoccupied table. It was almost midday and students had already invaded the place, some with books in their hands, their fork hanging hesitantly between their plates and their mouths, some with a bunch of friends telling hilarious jokes, stuffing their stomachs with dry chicken and greasy french fries. I finally spotted one by the window, and I was about to head toward it when I realized who was sitting at the table a few feet away from mine. Peter was staring blankly through the window, a sandwich and a glass of water in front of him. The sandwich was intact, which actually was not surprising at all – his appetite was probably not at its best. I took a moment to decide whether it was a good idea or not to go and talk to him, but then he turned his head and his eyes met mine with what seemed to be determination, so I just couldn't walk out and pretend not to have seen him. I breathed deeply and finally joined him, slaloming between the tables, trying not to spill my coffees.

'This place is one of the reason I didn't go to college, ' I said with a smile, pushing one coffee toward him. 'Awful food and awful organization.'

'Where is she?' he only asked coldly sipping his glass of water as if accepting my coffee meant fraternizing with the enemy.

'She needed to go to the toilets, she'll be back in a minute. Maybe... We could use that time to talk.'

'Okay. You have one minute to tell me everything you want.'

'Peter I... I'm sorry for what happened this morning, but we had to. You heard Walter, she needed to...

'Do you really think,' he interrupted me with a dark look. 'That what you did was necessary? She could have done it by herself, all she needed was to be alone. But no, you didn't even take the time to think about it, because the only thing you could think about is her naked under you.'

'No!' I exclaimed, yet perfectly knowing he was right. I had reacted instantly and I didn't analyze the situation as I should have done. Of course I could have led her to the other room and just wait, but my emotions had once again took the control. 'I... Listen, I know it was a mistake, but for God's sake you heard what Walter said, it's not our fault!'

'I know it isn't,' he answered, and for a second I thought he was willing to understand. 'But I also know that you are one of the strongest person I have ever met, and I also know that if you really would have wanted to control yourself, you could have.'

'You have no idea what it feels like.' I whispered, my fingers clenching on the cup of coffee.

'What does it feel like, then?' he asked, fiddling with the bread of his sandwich. 'What feeling can possibly get the better of Olivia Dunham?'

'I don't know... I honestly don't know Peter.' I quickly said when I saw his mouth opening to retaliate. 'It's like all my emotions are duplicated whenever I'm close to her. They're not even true feelings. I only feel because she feels. It's a vicious circle that only ends when we stay apart long enough, or when we find a way to fix it.'

'Then why doesn't she leave?'

'Because she can't. If she leaves, I die. Until Walter finds a solution she's the only thing that keeps me alive. Without her I can't feel anything, I'm just an empty shell. Emotions are what makes you human, without them you're nothing. Without her, I won't find the courage to hold on to you because the love I feel for you would vanish with her. Loving her is the only thing I can fight to convince myself I still love you. If those feelings I have for her dies, then there's no more reason to keep fighting and the feelings I have for you, and have fought for without respite will die as well. And the last thing I want is to lose you.'

'You would have done great in a college play, you know. You almost sound convincing' he said with a grin. I blinked, not really knowing if my eyes were betraying me or not. _Is that a friendly smile on his face? _Even his look seemed to be amused, and when he finally took the coffee in front of him with a smile and a 'thank you' I knew it wasn't my imagination.

'But... You...' I mumbled, unable to formulate clearly what I wanted to say. I was shocked, to say the least because that was the last reaction I had expected coming from him.

'Maybe I'm stubborn, but I'm not stupid.' he said, crossing his fingers around the cup. 'I don't like this, I don't like you being closer to her than to me, but it's time for me to realize that it really isn't your fault. I'm not saying that I'm fine with it but for now, I accept that you two are experiencing something that's beyond understanding. I still don't like her much and I still think that you could have avoided many embarrassing situations if you've wanted to, but I don't blame you, at least not as much as you probably think.'

'That's good to know,' I replied with a soft smile, knowing that he was making a lot of efforts to try and make things easier. I could see he was tensed, he was holding the cup of coffee too tightly and the dark drink was on the verge of overflow, but he was doing his best not to show it. I pretended I didn't notice anything and just watched him swallow a large sip of coffee, his eyes wandering on the noisy crowd behind my back. In spite of what he had just said, he kept on avoiding my look, and even though I knew he wasn't ready for a stable relationship with me, I was still hoping he would do a step toward me. I was about to tell him that I understood his doubts and that I didn't mind him being distant to me, but that it wasn't the best solution to fix our enormous issue, when he suddenly frowned, his eyes focused behind the window.

'What is it?' I asked, while he was bending over the table to get a better sight.

'Oh, shit!' he exclaimed, quickly getting up and heading to the main entrance, attracting the students' attention. 'Come on, hurry!' he cried over his shoulder, not even bothering to apologize to the girl he knocked down. He had never been the dramatic type, or at least not to this extent – he pretended that he never had had the gift for drama and that he failed miserably every time he tried to look convincing – and his attitude could only mean one thing : he wasn't playing, something bad was really happening outside. A powerful rush of adrenaline reached my heart, the loud thumps echoing in my chest and resounding loudly in my ears, and a fraction of second later I was dashing between the students, a hand on my holster, following Peter's steps. The closer I got to the door, the more distress I could feel, and I perfectly knew it wasn't a product of my imagination. Sweat began to ooze over my whole body because that feeling wasn't mine – or at least not entirely. It was Olivia's, and whatever was happening out there, she was involved in its darkest part. I finally burst into the corridor, the swing doors sent flying hard against the walls, and I stopped breathing a moment when I saw it. Three, maybe four silhouettes were outlined against the smoked glass doors at the end of the corridor, but I couldn't tell much more from my position. I grabbed my gun forcefully, trying to control my trembling hands, the cold metal on my skin feeling like a white-hot heated blade leaving burning blisters all over my fingers. I thought that it was a reaction due to the fact that I was afraid to use it – Olivia's panic was infecting me and I feared not only for her life, but also for my own. I used to love taking risks, saving people whatever the chances of dying were. Only not this time. I thought I wouldn't be able to hold it any longer, but then Peter opened the door a little so I could assess the situation and act accordingly. I caught a glimpse of red hair, black suits, I saw a black van with its doors opened waiting in the back, and instantaneously, my gun turned into the most wonderful thing I had ever owned. Finally my feelings had surpassed hers, and my desire to just run away and leave had evolved into a deadly need to save her. The tiger in my chest rose on his hind legs and it felt like my whole body was surrounded by an aura of power, as if I had suddenly become invincible. Determination and confidence, both melted in a boiling fireball, it didn't take much more for me to head straight to the doors, my arms tensed in anticipation. Of course, Peter tried to hold me back, but the voices in my head were too loud – they kept telling me to do my best to save her, to do my best to stay alive – and I didn't hear what he said. I didn't even take the time to think about twice before I pushed the door with a self-assurance I wouldn't have expected coming from me, and a second later I was outside, facing four armed men who didn't seem to be very surprised to see me. One of them was taking Olivia hostage, pressing his gun on the side of her neck, the other three were just here to assure him a way out in case anything should go wrong. There was no hiding place so I wouldn't be able to avoid any of their gunshots, and yet I still believed that things would turn to our advantage. I aimed my gun at the kidnapper with a piercing look, but from where I was I couldn't take the risk of shooting – I didn't want Olivia to get hurt and if I shot that would inevitably cause damage – and judging by the smirk he was bearing I realized he was thinking the exact same thing. _Shot him in the head_. The thought popped in my mind as if it was an evidence, but I had no idea where it came from. It was a stupid thought, though, because shooting him in the head wasn't any better than shooting him anywhere else. _Shot him in the head_, the voice in my brain repeated whereas I was trying hard to get rid of it. I could think properly about a solution with this incessant buzzing filling my ears, and I shook my head, hoping this would help clearing. I was about to focus on the man once again, but my eyes were drawn towards _hers_. There was something disturbing in her intense gaze, just as if... Just as if _she _was the one trying to communicate. I blinked, and then I saw that little spark deep in her pupils. _He's a shapeshifter, aim at his head_. She nodded almost imperceptibly, and I nodded back, because there could be no doubt left. The man was slowly starting to take a few steps back, but he wouldn't get away that easily. A weird feeling possessed me for what seemed to be long minutes, it was like everything was evolving in slow motion, but later I realized that it only took a second. I stared into her eyes, still keeping the kidnapper and his accomplices in my field of vision even though it felt like they weren't important anymore. My sight got blurred for a moment, and when I focused back on her everything looked different and especially weird. From one eye, I could still see her and that tall guy behind her, but from the other I could see myself, standing straight on the step, with the gun pointed at them. It was as if I could see the whole of the scene from her point of view as well as mine. I didn't know how all of this could be happening, nor why, but I had lived so many strange things for the past few days that nothing could surprise me much anymore. It took me some time before I got used to that sensation – it was quite disturbing, to see everything from two different angles at the same time – but when I did, it turned into a real advantage. It helped me find the perfect angle to shoot at the kidnapper without taking too much risks. From Olivia's point of view, I could see whether the bullet would reach her or not, which of course gave me better chances of not reaching her. I adjusted my aim, giving myself a few seconds of hesitation, but then the man stepped back once again, getting closer and closer to the van, and I knew it wouldn't be long before she would disappear in its dark trunk. _Shoot him now_, her voice was whispering as my index gently pressed the trigger, but not enough for the bullet to be fired. _Come on_, she begged as the vision I got from her was becoming foggy. There was not much time left before it would fade and everything would get back to normal – I didn't know how to control this brand new power, or whatever that might be – and I knew that the longer I stayed like this, doing nothing, the more the risk of shooting at her was important. _Come on, do it now_! I took a deep breath, and my finger slowly went away from the trigger. I couldn't shoot, I couldn't do that I couldn't kill her. I just couldn't be the one who was going to kill her. I took a step back myself, lowering the end of my gun. _Olivia, please_! Her voice was getting louder inside my head, trying to fight my own conscience, but it wasn't loud enough. I would have wanted to do more, I wanted to save her, the need to save her life was still in my chest, alive and kicking, and the tiger was roaring more than ever. But I just couldn't kill her. I was about to give up, when finally what sounded like the most convincing scream of despair rang in my brain. _SHOOT HIM_! For a second, it made me lose the control, lose my balance, lose my focus. I closed my eyes, everything turning into a black, thick cloud, every sound, every smell, every single feeling disappearing in a giant black hole. And I shot.

* * *

Sorry once again, it's been a while since I've posted a new chapter, but I work 6 days out of 7, from 5.00 am to 9.00 pm and I honestly don't have much time to write ! :)

I hope you still like this story though, and don't worry, I still have a lot of ideas and I know where this story is going to end. I can assure you I won't give this story up, you'll just have to be patient to read the next chapters ! =)

Thanks for reading, and please do not hesitate to leave comments, they always help ! ;D


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11  
**

I didn't hear the sound of the bullet being fired, I didn't even feel the usually strong vibration irradiating my whole arm, from the hand to the shoulder. I even wondered for a fraction of second if I really had shot. My fingers were clenched tightly around the butt of my gun, my knuckles probably already white pale, but simply was unable to let go of it. Every square centimeter of every muscle in my body was tensed, I had become a statue of granite, still and unable to think, or even feel anything. Of course, I still had enough consciousness to put an end to this trance, but I was unwilling to. I just didn't want to open my eyes only to find out that I had killed her. Usually, I was quite good at facing the consequences of my own acts. Take the truth with its worse sides and deal with it. Killing this woman probably was the exception. No. Not probably. It _was_ the exception. That woman herself was an exception, in each and every way possible. An exceptional exception. She was so special, so perfect, I couldn't be the ordinary someone who took that special someone's life. I could have spent an eternity standing there, completely unaware of what was happening around me, the never-ending war of thoughts in the deepest part of my own person, mental and physique intertwined altogether, yet still raging with more intensity than ever. Then I felt it. The tiger in my chest, which had surely been there since the beginning, suddenly whined loudly, the sound waves echoing through my ribs, just like when you can feel the detonation of the fireworks resounding in your whole body on a fourth of July. At the moment I couldn't tell whether it was sorrow or pain, or even a mix of both, but I could definitely feel that it had nothing to do with some kind of celebration. It was extremely powerful, at least twice as much as when I had thought that Olivia was dead, and that wasn't of any consolation. Tears were slowly growing behind my eyelids – maybe they were already cascading on my cheek, I couldn't have told the difference – because that feeling could only mean that what I feared the most had happened. This time, she really was dead, and there was no turning back. And I was the one responsible. I had killed her. That single thought, the only one that followed those long seconds of semi-consciousness, was seething in my brain, hindering my ability to reason and think of an appropriate solution to this disaster. I tried to control the explosion of emotion that burst in my chest, all of this sadness and anger I thought could be harmful for my mental health after everything that I had been through evolving into a desperate need to stop that grotesque masquerade my life had become. I tried to ignore the fact that I still had that fiendish thing that had put an end to her life, and could help me put an end to my own as well – because like I had told Peter a few minutes ago, without her I had no more reason to keep on living and wandering for the rest of my life without a goal wasn't something I was prepared for. I tried to focus on something that would help me forget as long as possible that this wasn't a childish nightmare I would wake up from, that I was probably experiencing one last time those terrible feelings eating you from the inside, the same ones that make you who you are. I waited, for a sound I could analyze, a smell I could define, a sensation I could describe... Anything that would help me forget that I had become a murderer who had killed the most precious thing she could call her own. And then, all of the sudden... A drop on my cheek. Heavy. Just as if it was a rain drop which had born the weight of its long journey and as finally able to get rid of it landing on my skin. That was all I needed. It felt hot, but it probably was only because my whole body was cold. It was small, not any larger than an apple's seed, I presumed. From the outside it undoubtedly looked like one of the many tears coating my face, only I could tell the difference. What I didn't know, on the contrary, was where it came from. It wasn't rain, that was a fact I was almost sure of – unless it was a single-drop rain, it just couldn't be. What was it then? I didn't even get the time to think about it when I felt it slid along my face, slowly, before it found the corner of my lips. I instantaneously had the reflex to sweep my tongue over it to clean it, while little by little, my senses became more and more accurate. I could hear a distant voice calling my name, like a far away plea. I could feel the breeze on my neck, as if someone was standing right behind me, blowing softly against my skin, but without being able to feel their presence. I could smell... Smell an acid fragrance I was sure I had already smelt before, assaulting my nostrils just like the smell of corpses did whenever I had to look at them closely. And I could taste that so particular bittersweet, coppery taste, filling my mouth and sliding down my throat as I swallowed, the same one I was sure I knew but couldn't quite define. It only took a fraction second, it all happened so fast... I suddenly realize what that smell and what that taste were. _Blood_. All my senses came back at once, breaking the trance I had been experiencing for no more than a minute, and my eyes shot open. What I saw... What I saw was just beyond imagination. Olivia was running toward me, her hair flying behind her like a red flag, with the kind of look that makes you understand everything without a single word. She seemed terrified – I didn't quite know why at the moment, because I had noticed the three shapeshifters were down, lying in a pool of silver liquid, gaping holes in their forehead. I was about to smile, because in the end she was alive, she didn't seem to be hurt, and that was everything we all wanted. But those weren't the object of her nasty scare, it was something else, something that had happened in my direction, probably behind me. _Peter_. With a pang in my stomach, I turned on my heels to make sure he was okay, only to find out that he was the one standing a few feet away from me, frozen in a strange posture, looking as scared as Olivia – if not more. The smile that had almost had the chance to crack on my face never showed, in the end. How could it, with all that despair and terror in the air I didn't even know where they came from? Then I remembered the blood. I looked down, only to find my feet in the middle of a little red puddle, and soon I realized that my shirt and pants were soaked, drips rolling on my skin and splashing on the floor.

'How... No...' I whispered, the pieces of the puzzle assembling in my brain. But that was impossible, I hadn't felt anything... I finally let go of my gun, my shaky hands unable to hold it anymore. It fell on the hard concrete with a thump, bounced on the floor and stopped a few feet away from me. But that didn't matter. I gently brushed the tips of my fingers against my stomach, expecting to feel an excruciating pain, but nothing happened. Impossible... I looked at my fingers, just to make sure it wasn't a product of my imagination. Red. All over my hand, red everywhere, darkening my clothes and glistening on my skin. Maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was because I was dead already, maybe... Maybe... The world started spinning around me, the grass, the trees, the sky, all of them melting in an abstract painting of vivid colors, as a last reminder of everything you can only savor when you are alive and that I had missed. All at once, the last of my strength vanished, just as if it had been drained from my muscles, and it didn't take long before my legs bent like two ridiculously weak straws in the wind. I toppled over forward, and my knees hit one of the step. They were way to fragile to resist to the dead-weight I had become and I heard my kneecaps crushing on the edge of the step. I finally plopped, my basic instincts sharp enough to force me to extend my arms a little, preventing my head from knocking too hard on the floor. Face down, it was hard to breathe, and I could now feel a slight tickle in my belly, which I knew was announcing the upcoming, and surely horrible pain. Someone turned me on my back, and I finally was able to take a deep breath, which did not only make the pain in my stomach worse but also made me realize that breathing was something exhausting. It felt like my lungs were imprisoned in vises, and each time I tried to fill them with fresh air was turning into a real showdown. Two strong hands tugged at my coat forcefully, ripping the buttons off, and thankfully the weight pressing my chest lightened.

'Has someone called 911 yet?' Peter's loud voice asked, though it sounded a bit distant to me, and the same hands landed on the wound tearing my stomach apart, probably trying to stop the bleeding – which wasn't worth going to trouble, I thought. Another pair of hands came to rest on my shoulder, and it's only when my whole arm throbbed with pain, as if electrocuted, that I understood how blood could have reached my cheek. I had got shot there too. Two wounds, twice as much blood. There was no way I could survive injuries that serious.

'Come on, Olivia', I heard Olivia whisper above me, her fingers curling to get a better hold on my shoulder. 'You can't do that to me, you gotta hold on, okay?'

'I... I can't...' I whimpered, unable to do much more. I didn't even know if she had heard me, her sniffles might have covered my words, but I couldn't repeat myself without using the very last of my strength – if ever there was some left. It was true, though. I wouldn't be able to hold on. I tried not to show it, but I knew things they didn't. They didn't know that my right arm had become a lifeless limb I couldn't control anymore, that the only thing I felt was a phantom sensation at the tip of my fingers and an unbearable pain somewhere between my clavicle and humerus. They didn't know that the coughs I was containing were like burning flames licking my already sore throat. They didn't know that blood had began to fill my mouth and that I was doing my best not to let it pearl in the corner of my lips. They didn't know my vision was getting blurred every time I tried to focus on something else than the powerful, dazzling light of the sun filtering through my half-closed eyelids. They were doing their best to keep me alive, and for that I was thankful – even if Peter crushing his palms on my stomach wasn't quite helping. I smiled, lightly, as much as I could, and tried to reach Peter's leg. My finger brushed against his thigh, and though he probably didn't feel it through his thick jeans, _I_ was glad to touch him one last time before I would go.

'Thank you', I finally whispered – maybe I just thought about these words, I couldn't tell – and my arms fell flat back on my side, palm facing the floor. My head became heavy, I couldn't feel any of my limbs anymore, and even the pain had flown away. My eyes closed by themselves and there was no use to struggle to keep them open to take one last look at her face. I didn't need to to remember it, anyway. And it was with that last, beautiful picture in mind, with the muffled sound of their cries reaching my ears, with the rancid smell of the blood I was lying in, with the sensation of a vanishing floor under me, that everything turned black. Death had finally found me.

* * *

_I'm not truly happy with this chapter (I would have liked to develop it a little more, I think that some passages are worth a few lines more), but I wanted to update the story before my little trip to Paris, so I decided to post it anyway ! :) [I may rewrite it later, though, I'll let you know if that's the case]_

_It's shorter than usual, but as there's not a lot of dialogues I don't think the difference is very important. I hope you like it, and please review, your opinion is important to me! :)_


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12  
**

That moment. That moment when I felt more desperate than I had never been in my whole life. When, suddenly, I realized that no matter how strong I felt, that no matter how many man I had killed in my career, that not matter how many horrible situation I had succeeded in overcoming, I was still vulnerable. And when that dark-eyed man had grabbed me by behind, I had, for the first time, experienced that awful feeling of helplessness. I hadn't tried to escape because I knew that it was useless, and that if I were to be locked up somewhere until someone found me that I would better save my strength. And the gun on my temple was a good argument too.  
'We don't need you, we need _her,_' he had told me before pushing me outside, as to warn me that he wouldn't hesitate to kill me. And there I was, in the middle of the alley bordered with terrified students – who were literally freaking me out, because none of them seemed to be intelligent enough to call for help –, my nails digging in the arm wrapped around my shoulders. A black van parked in front of us, and though the distance separating it from me was quite considerable, it seemed way to close, and I could only focus on its door opening on two other men. I was feeling a bit like when I was chasing a bad guy : my heart was racing in my chest, all my senses on alert, my mouth dry, ready to anticipate every movement that would let me a chance to take the advantage upon him. Except that the adrenaline usually feeding the wonderful sensation of excitement was now nurturing that awful feeling of fear and helplessness. If he had been alone, I could have tried something – I had always been quite good at scuffling, I was sure I could have kicked his ass before he could even touch me -, but with the three figureheads walking on our sides there was nothing I could do without taking the risk of being sent straight six feet under. They didn't looked very clever, but that didn't make them any less dangerous. We were only a few meters away from the van when a loud voice rose behind us.

'Hey!'

The man's arm tightened around me as he turned quickly on his heel, his gun aimed at where the voice had come from. I immediately recognized Peter, and when the abductor shot I jumped violently, terrified that he might have killed him. It wasn't that I cared much about him, but Olivia did, and that was an excellent reason to want him alive. I softly sighed of relief when I saw him crawl on the doorstep, one of his hand searching for the handle and the other covering his head. He disappeared inside, and I thought it was the end. The moment the kidnapper had caught me off guard and threatened me to kill me, I had hoped that _she_ would have been the one to save me. What I had not expected was to see the man who hated me the most came to help me first. I quite didn't know if I was glad to not see her coming – because that meant that she was safe, and only that mattered to me – or in the contrary hurt, because she didn't care for me as much as I did for her. I chased that thought away, knowing it wasn't the time to go over that fateful question once again. The man took a step back, now more careful about his surroundings, believing that some others might come for me. The barrel of his gun was now pressing forcefully against the side of my neck, and it even sank deeper in my skin when he saw the door open one more time. I felt so relieved when I saw the hem of her coat, and then her whole body pass the door that I almost laughed, because I knew that everything was going to be alright. She aimed her own gun at us – at _him_ – and she looked very confidant, though I could feel she was not. And I totally understood. The distance between us was fairly long, and if she didn't shoot at the right angle, if there was a single breeze, or if she even trembled slightly, I could get killed. I was scared to say the least, and her own anxiety was seeping in my bloodstream, which wasn't really reassuring. I lowered my eyes to concentrate on the floor, to ignore the fact that she might shot me at any moment, and that's when I saw it. The man's sleeve was rolled up a bit, revealing a single scratch on his forearm. It didn't seem serious, but it was deep enough for blood to ooze from the small injury. Or at least, it should have been blood. Only, it was a drip of a shiny, silver substance that had slid along his skin. I froze, realizing that it wasn't a man at all. It was a shapeshifter. And they probably all were. I lift my head up quickly, looking for Olivia's eyes, even though I had no idea on how telling that to her without alerting them. But she wasn't even looking at me, staring icily at the shapeshifter behind me, still not daring to make a move. _Come on, look at me_, I thought, my forehead wrinkling with concentration. _Olivia look at me, please_. She remained impassive, and it only made the feeling of despair grow bigger in my stomach. _You need to shoot him in the head. _I focused on those words, emphasizing each of them, repeating them again and again. I didn't know why I kept thinking that sentence, but I had the weird impression that somehow she could hear me. It didn't work because she didn't want to listen, but I was convinced that if I succeeded in creating a connection with her then she would be able to listen to me. I tried, over and over again, the same words resounding loudly in my head. It seemed to me that I had spent an eternity thinking, and thinking tirelessly, until I finally noticed a slight change in her expression. She was still tensed, her stare was more frosty that ever, but I had seen the almost imperceptible look of surprise and her mouth opening lightly. _That's it, shoot him in the head, _I insisted, hoping she was decoding the message correctly. She finally directed her sight toward me, and I gazed at her with a tiny nod. _He's a shapeshifter, aim at his head_. I flashed a smile when she nodded back, letting me know that she had understood.

'What the hell is happening?' the shapeshifter whispered in my ear, his arms tightening even more around my neck. I swore under my breath, knowing that I had probably betrayed myself by relaxing too much in his arms – which was something utterly stupid, because I wasn't sure that I was going to pull through. He took a step back, then another, and the world started to spin around me. I lost my balance, unable to follow his steps, and I closed my eyes tightly to avoid falling. A weird, disagreeable feeling ran through me, the forerunners of a terrible headache awakening in my brain. I clung on to his arm to try and keep standing on my feet, and it took me some time before I was able to control my body. I finally opened my eyes back, and for a moment a thought I was going to faint. I blinked a few times, not believing what I was seeing. That was crazy. And weird. And scary. I lifted my hand, just to make sure that it wasn't my imagination.

'What the...?' I mumbled, the headache now feeling like a monstrous cacophony echoing in my head. How could it be otherwise when you were seeing the world from two different points of view at the same time? I didn't know if the same thing was happening to Olivia, and how it was affecting her, but that was something _I_ just couldn't stand. _Shoot him now_, I begged, unable to bear that horrible sensation anymore. _Come on... Come on, do it now..._ I struggled to keep my eyes open because I didn't know if closing them would unable her to see from my personal point of view and I didn't know if she was using it to aim at the shapeshifter either – although she didn't seem in a hurry. _Olivia, please..._ My eyelids fluttered, and I only caught a glimpse of her, lowering her gun. _No_, I thought, pain exploding in my brain as if it was a balloon full of needles being poked. _No, no no, you have to do it... _I swallowed hard as the shapeshifter took another step back, getting dangerously close to the van. I finally gave up, closing my eyes once more, almost falling into his arms. _Shoot him now!_ I thought forcefully, as if I had shouted it out loud, in a last attempt to convince her to pull the trigger. The sound of a shot rang, deafening, and suddenly the headache disappeared, just like the awful feeling and that double-vision thing. I felt the arm of the shapeshifter slid along my side, and a loud thump reached my ear when he fell hard on the ground. I didn't take the time to assimilate completely the information, and hurried to grab his gun on the floor. I kicked the shapeshifter coming from the left on his knee before he could fire and shot him on the head. It was followed by another detonation, and then another, before I could even turn on my heels. I knew they hadn't been aiming at me, and still I felt just like I had been the one reached by the bullets. Pain irradiated from my shoulder and stomach, almost bringing me to tears, but I did my best to keep control of my body and not collapse. I knew I wasn't physically hurt, as real as it may seem, it was then quite easy to ignore it. My fingers clenched tighter around the gun and I was quick to shoot the closest shapeshifter, first in his thigh to keep him for firing his gun, and then in his head to make sure he wouldn't cause any more harm. I was about to kill the last one standing when I realized there wasn't any ammunition left. He smirked as if he knew he had won. He was a bit too confident. I threw my gun away and ran toward him, putting all my strength in what may be my last heroic action of my life. Thankfully, he was too surprised to do anything, and I returned his smirk before twisting violently his arm to the point he had to let go of his weapon. He gasp in pain, and before he could even try to beg me to let him go I took his head into my hands and wrung his neck, which broke with the most satisfying crack. I turned round, ready to face the ones from the van, but they had already left – which was pretty weird, because they could have easily defeated me. I didn't mind, though, that was sparing me the trouble to fight against them. I took a second to compose myself, and then I remembered... _Olivia_. My heart began to hammer against my ribcage, each time cracking a little, and I had never been so afraid that it might have broke for good. My eyes widening with horror and scare, I saw her dropped her gun, and slowly falling forward. She didn't look afraid, nor in pain. Only surprise was showing on her face, as of she didn't understand why all that was even happening. I found myself unable to move for a moment, my nails digging in my palms, shaking my head. That wasn't happening. It couldn't be happening. It couldn't. Then I saw Peter trying to reach for her before she would fall. I saw some girls crying, terrified, their hands covering their mouths. I saw some boys, as wide-eyed as I was, their noses pressed against the windows of the cafeteria. Then I realized it was real. She was bleeding – she was bleeding so much, a large streak was already gliding on the steps. She was falling. And she was looking at me with that foul look of incomprehension and helplessness. I released the breath I didn't know I had been holding, tears rolling on my cheeks, and I started running, running as fast as I could, my hand trying to reach for her. But she was too far, way too far, and when she fell hard on the concrete it felt like a knife had came throughout my whole body. When I knelt next to her, Peter was tugging on her coat and suit to reveal her dark shirt, stained with a large ring of blood.

'Has somebody called 911 yet?' he asked loudly to the crowd, his moves a little uncoordinated – probably because of the shock. He pressed his shaking hands on the wound tearing her stomach apart, and I hurried to press mine on her shoulder. I was doing my best not to let my emotions show, only when I realized how much blood Olivia was losing, I couldn't help but burst into tears. I glanced at Peter, trying to find some comfort, but he seemed as moved as I was. I looked down, knowing that if I saw him cry, it would only worsen my own cries.

'Come on Olivia' I whispered, my voice trembling so much that I even wondered if she had understood – I didn't even know if she was still conscious at the moment. 'You can't do that to me, you gotta hold on, okay?' My fingers clenched tighter on the wound, but it didn't keep the blood from flowing on my hands. She had become so pale that the dark trail of blood on her cheek looked brighter than a red rose lost in a field of snow. I bent over her, my forehead resting on hers, praying softly for her life. She was so cold... I could even hear her breathe, but I was too scared to make sure she was still alive. The sirens of the ambulance rang somewhere far off, getting closer and closer to us, but I couldn't help thinking that it was too late. I remained silent for a long moment, trying to reconnect with her, but every attempt was a complete failure. All the feelings I used to experience when I was with her... All these feelings had disappeared. Of course I was too much of a coward to admit it to myself, but somehow I knew what it meant. And if had dared to come to that conclusion, then maybe I would have committed the irreparable. There was still hope, I had to hold on to that single, tiny ray shining dimly somewhere in me. Lost in my thoughts, I jumped lightly when someone landed a friendly hand on my shoulder.

'It's okay, ma'am', someone – probably one of the doctors I hadn't seen coming – said softly. 'We're going to take good care of her.'

I nodded, not really aware of what was really happening, and I got back on my weak legs, backing up to give them some space. I was barely listening to what they were saying, but the little I understood didn't bode well. At least, that meant she was still alive. It didn't take long before they took her away in that ambulance, and all I could do was to watch it leave the alley, feeling empty and utterly dejected. I didn't know how long I had been standing there, my arms dangling, when someone took my hand, calloused fingers intertwining with mine. I look on the side, only to find Peter looking at me with humid eyes.

'I think it's time for us to stick together,' he said lowly, his voice a bit distorted with sorrow.

I nodded, squeezing his hand back, and though I didn't say a word, he understood. We had to do it. Not for us. But for Olivia.

* * *

_Phew! It's been a while since I updated this story, so I decided to post a chapter a little bit longer than usual ! :)_

_I know it isn't really original, it's basically a mix of chapters 10 & 11 told from a different point of view, but I think it's necessary to do the transition bewteen these chapters and the following ones._

_Anyway, I hope you liked it, and I plan to post another chapter in a few weeks. As you might already have guessed, the next part of this story will be about the shapeshifter thing, so there might be a little more action ! :)_


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

I stood still for long minutes, staring blankly at the lifeless landscape in front of me. The students were gone, only the bodies of the shapeshifters remained lying on the concrete. I was unable to think straight, the soft buzzing filling my ears keeping me from expressing clear thoughts. The only thing that had changed radically enough for me to notice was the thing inside me, which had, for no apparent reasons, stopped existing. Just as if it had given its last breath before giving up, the humming that had constantly made my chest vibrate for days and days had finally stopped. It further aggravated the horrible feeling of emptiness crushing my shoulders, and when I realized what it could mean, guilt and terror added up on the already long lists of feelings I definitely wanted to vanish.

'She's dead...' I whispered to myself, my fingers clenching tighter on Peter's hand, those words feeling like razor blades on my tongue.

'What?' he asked, his voice quivering, suddenly letting of my hand as if my skin had burnt him.

'Olivia... She's dead,' I repeated, unable to grasp the meaning of my own word. This simple statement would have been too absurd to be taken seriously in any other circumstances, but the thing had been my only physical connection with Olivia, the invisible bound that made us feel each other's emotions and sensations, and now it was gone. It could only mean that, one way or another, the bound had broken.

'How do you know that?' Peter asked, grasping my shoulders, staring into my eyes with such an intense look that I thought he too could read my mind. I understood that it must be hard for him to believe that I could know what was happening to Olivia – I had a hard time to believe in that _beast_, as Olivia called it, as well – but he should have know that I wouldn't have acknowledged such a horrible truth if I didn't believe it myself.  
'You wouldn't understand...' I breathed, my hands around his wrists, staring back at him. His eyes narrowed as he tried to decipher what I was thinking, but he then seemed to realize that I had nothing to hide and that I wasn't lying. It left him with his mouth quite agape, and he let go of my shoulder and quickly looked away. I would have wanted to say something comforting, but before I could find the right words, he turned back on his heels, his eyes full of tears and looking furious.

'How can you be so heartless?' he cried out, sweeping his palm over his face to wipe the heavy drops rolling on his cheeks. 'She would have done anything for you, and you... You don't even care!'

'I...' I tried to find something to retort, but after a few seconds I realized that he was right. I should have been devastated, I should have burst into tears, I should have needed to blame the whole world. But nothing. Her death left me indifferent. A few seconds before, I could have killed myself for feeling responsible for her dying. And now, nothing. I had stopped feeling the thing. And I had stopped feeling anything at all. That should have terrified me, because the last thing I wanted was to became an emotionless body wandering in a world driven by feelings. I knew I had always been some sort of outsider, but I had been proud of it. I could not be proud of this whole knew dimension the situation gave to this word, and I should be afraid of it. But it seemed that fear was one of those vanished feeling - or at least dying ones. I could still feel what probably was a phantom sensation what used to be a punch in my stomach, and a faded bitter taste in my throat, but I was quite unable to tell what feeling caused them. I would have wanted to cry, I knew that if I had felt what I should have felt, tears would be now cascading on my cheeks. But I couldn't, just because my heart didn't see any reasons to. I slowly stepped away, ashamed of being such a coward unable to face the consequences of everything that was happening. I regretted – or at least I thought that that acid taste burning my tongue was caused by this now foreign feeling of remorse, - I regretted that I had given in so easily, back in my universe, to that wonderful sensation that had drove me to create this almost paranormal link with Olivia. I knew that I should have resisted, I knew that I should have let her go when she asked to. I had tempted the Devil and now was the time to repay him in kind. I was about to get away, when Peter grabbed me by the arm.

'We need to know why they were after you', he said, apparently having dried his tears – though I could see how downcast he still was. I knew he wasn't the kind of man to let his emotions show, but sometimes even the strongest ones can't help it. He had just lost the woman he loved – so did I – and I perfectly understood that he wanted to do something to focus on anything but her.

'They were after me because I'm traitor', I said weakly, knowing there was no use to investigate a case we already knew the outcome of. 'The only thing we can do is hide, if we don't want them to find us.'

'We're not gonna hide. We're gonna go after them. We'll find them first', he said, rolling his sleeves up. He walked straight toward the corpse of one of the shapeshifter, dragging me behind him.

'What's the use?' I sighed, kneeling beside him as he tucked out the shirt of the dead body.

'They know a lot of things about your universe', he explained as he took a pocket knife out his jeans pocket. 'If we can learn their knowledge, we can find a way to dominate them.'

I shrugged my shoulders, because I really didn't see why it seemed so important to him. Shapeshifters were only agents from my universe infiltrated in theirs, whom goal was mainly to spy on them – and sometimes try to destroy this world when they discovered a major outbreak in war tech that could help them fulfill their mission, but obviously they failed at every attempt. They weren't smart, the little they know came from a database secretly kept in a Fringe Division basement somewhere under Liberty Island. They all started their lives with the same knowledge, that they could enrich with personal experience – which basically consisted in observing people, tailing them, killing them. Therefore, there was nothing exceptionally interesting to learn from a shapeshifter, but Peter was convinced of the contrary and I didn't want to contradict him. I watched him slowly slice the skin in the lower back of the machine, mercury flowing past the deep cut and staining his hand with the shiny silver substance. I frowned of disgust when he plunged is hand in the wound, looking for the memory card.

'You should at least wear gloves', I told him as he took the card out of the body with a moan of discontentment when he realized it had been damaged in the fight. 'Mercury is dangerous.'

'There are three bodies left' he said, royally ignoring what I had suggested, and he headed for the closest one. He repeated the same operation twice, and this time he was able to collect cards which were still in perfect condition. He put them inside his pocket, wiped his knife clean on his jeans and headed for the last shapeshifter. I crouched next to him, wondering what we were doing here, collecting information we didn't even know how to extract. All of this was pointless. He had said he wanted to learn things so that he could find a way to fight them back, but I knew that all he wanted was revenge. I understood his motivations, they had killed the woman he would have died for, they had taken almost everything away from him, but honestly, I didn't think that it would him good to seek something motivated by pain and anger. I had already experienced what it was like to avenge someone's death, forcing the ones responsible to pay their dues, and I had to admit that it feels really good when finally, you put that knife under their throats and slice it open. But what follows – the emptiness, the sadness that overwhelms you, the remaining sensation of guilt - , what follows is even worse than anything. I had had a hard time coming back from this quest, and it had taken even longer to forget about it. I didn't like Peter that much, but I didn't want him to go through what I had been through. I was about to reason him when suddenly, what felt like an electric shock ran through me, my whole body jolting.

'What's that?' Peter asked, turning to face me, looking a bit worried.  
'I don't kn...' I gasped in ache when the same weird, painful sensation struck me. I wrapped my arms around me, unable to breathe, and I slowly laid down on the floor. My heart missed a few beats, and my chest swelled heavily when I finally was able to take a deep breath. My limbs were shaking helplessly, and the sunlight was blinding so much that I had to close my eyes tightly to keep them from burning. I curled up on my side, my fingers digging in Peter's forearm, tears rolling on my cheeks.

'What's wrong with you?', he muttered, putting his hand on my forehead.

'No idea', I replied between sharp breaths, trying to regain control of my body. It only lasted a few seconds, which felt like an eternity to me, when all of the sudden, something burst inside me, and a hundred of feelings all melted in the same wave flowed in my veins. It left me wide-eyed, and for an instant I wondered what was happening to me. Then I understood. It all made sense. My hand released Peter's arm, and I smiled, resting my head back on the floor, forgetting everything about the pain, about the guilt, about the shame. And then I laughed. I laughed like I had never laughed in my damned life. My stomach was contracting with cramps, my breath was so short that I thought I might suffocate, but I didn't care. The _thing_ was back.

'What is it, now?' Peter asked, pinning my arms to the floor. 'Have you gone crazy?' Of course, the poor man had no idea what was going on and I couldn't blame him. He couldn't know how I felt, after all.

'No', I answered, finally succeeding in calming that burst of laugh after a long moment. I looked at him with the kind of smile I usually didn't use – the happy Olivia kind, which was so bright that it could make everyone else smile –, and I couldn't help but wrap my hands around his neck, drawing him in a tight hug. He didn't react when he heard me sniff, nor when I sighed deeply of satisfaction. He only did when I finally told him.

'It's Olivia...' I whispered in his ear. 'It seems she's back from the dead.'

I had expected every reaction but the one he had. He pushed me back roughly, looking rather angry, and I for a moment I thought he had misunderstood me. Olivia was alive, and the cheerful thing jumping of joy in my chest was the most significant proof that ever existed, and yet...

'You gotta be kidding me!' he shouted, putting his hand through his hair, laving a shiny trace on its way. 'How can you just do that!'

'Do what?' I asked, the bubble of genuine joy I had been feeling popping like a balloon.

'You told me she was dead, and now, oh well, she's alive again! This is nonsense! How can you know that anyway? This is stupid, you're not even sure of what you're saying!'

'I am sure', I replied patiently, knowing that it might be hard to believe when he didn't feel what I was feeling. 'Hasn't Olivia told you about... Something that we share? Like feelings, or something?'

'Yes, she told me about that' he said, apparently desperate to evoke that subject again. 'And what the hell does it have to do with you killing her and resuscitating her whenever you like?'

'This is ridiculous, I can't control her life!' I told him, shaking my head. 'It's just... Those feelings I share with Olivia... They can't exist if one of us dies. I knew she died the moment they disappeared.'

'This is crazy', he sighed, his fists on his hips, beginning to pace. 'And how do you know she's alive, then? You felt it too?'

'Exactly,' I answered calmly. 'And I swear to you this is true, I wouldn't have given you false hopes.'

'Right', he nodded, stopping his never-ending round trips, but still a little agitated. 'Okay, then. Good. She's in good hands.'

He cleaned his shaking hands on his front jeans and knelt next to the last shapeshifter to collect the remaining memory card.

'We still need to know what they know,' he tried to justify himself before sticking the card in his pocket. 'And they wanted you alive, that means you possess something they want. We need to find out about that too.'

I shrugged, not really knowing what shapeshifters could want from me – I didn't know anything they didn't, or at least not that I was aware of – but said nothing. He wanted answers, he would get them.

'I know someone who might be able to help us with these,' I told him, hoping he would trust me on this. He looked at me for a moment, probably weighing the pros and cons, and he finally nodded.

'Okay, let's go then.'

I flashed a smile, which he didn't return, and followed him to his car, hoping that the acquaintance I was hoping to find was still where she was supposed to be, and most of all, that she was still alive...

* * *

_Okay, I agree, there isn't much action in this chapter, but I didn't expected it to go that way._

_I hope you like it anyway ! :)_


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

'Where are we going?' I asked Olivia – well, a far less appreciable version of the Olivia I loved, but it was somehow her nonetheless. She just glanced at me quickly and sat behind the wheel of the black SUV without a word. I clenched my teeth and fists and tried to remain as calm as possible before sitting next to her as the engine roared loudly. I had no idea where she was taken me and I even doubted that she really knew someone who could help us figure out the shapeshifter's agenda, but the only thing I could do was follow her lead. I looked at her, though I had rather have looked outside the window, and I noticed she bit the inside of her cheek, probably uneasy because she felt my stare on her. I guessed she was resisting the urge of looking back at me when she turned her eyes to the left rear-view mirror and checked the road behind us a little longer than necessary.

'No one is following us, if that's hat you're afraid of,' I teased her, more to annoy her than to entertain myself.

She pinched her lips in response with a heavy sigh she tried to muffle in the collar of her jacket, and I savored with pride this tiny revenge that I had well deserved.  
'So tell me, where are we going?' I asked again, and it was her turn to clench her teeth.  
'You'll see by yourself when we're there' she replied, still avoiding my look.

I shook my head, knowing that I wouldn't get anything more from her. I had thought there was a way we could work together, but I was wrong. We would never be able to get on because we both wanted and needed the same person, and this person couldn't be shared. None of us had mentioned it yet, neither I nor her had dared to tackle that issue, but that didn't mean we were not aware of it. I perfectly knew a kind of rivalry between I and her had settled ever since they came back in that universe. I even thought it was something even worse that rivalry. Oh yes, it was so much more than that. I had hoped we could have helped each other to overcome the whole situation, but as hard as I would have wished it to be possible, it wouldn't not have come true. It couldn't have come true. Because I hated her. Maybe I was possessive, quick-tempered, resentful and every other thing that I shouldn't be proud of, and maybe she didn't didn't deserve my hating her, but there was nothing I could do about it. She had stolen my Olivia and that was not a fact a man like me could ignore that easily. I truly believed their bizarre relationship could be scientifically explained – Olivia would never have done something like this, so it had to be – and that I was simply unable to wrap my mind around it. But I also truly believed they could have avoided it too, there was no way something as gross as than could have happened without their consent. And I truly believed that woman sitting next to me was the one who pushed Olivia to do it. Just the sight of those fingers on the wheel and the thought of them touching Olivia wherever I should have touched her first, and the sight of that mouth I found so appealing when I watched it stirring into the most delicious smile whenever Olivia was happy, and the thought of it traveling down a body I should have discovered first... It made me sick. All those things I loved in Olivia, from the tiniest wrinkle in the corner of her lips, to the color of her eyes, were turning into evil and repulsive things before my eyes. She disgusted me because she made me think of Olivia in a way that I would never, ever have before. That woman was everything Olivia was not and as much as I was ashamed of it, I could only see the bad in her. That wasn't fair and I knew it, but I wasn't looking for fairness nor objectiveness. I just wanted Olivia for myself and I would have done anything to get her. I was being selfish, I even had seen it in Olivia's eyes when she talked to me about their situation in the damn cafeteria. But even the little sparkle of resentment in the green of her irises had not made me feel guilty. I just knew what I wanted and I was ready to fight for it no matter what it took.

'We're almost there' she said lowly as we drove past old buildings lost in the dark depth of the city.  
It was probably just a trick played on me by my imagination, but the overall impression I got from that place was not good at all. It looked as if a greyish fog had suddenly fallen upon us, like a black cloud announcing a storm. There was not a single living soul around, not even an astray cat to be seen in the corner of a street. She slowed down when we approached a dead end, took a quick look around probably to make sure we were at the right place, and finally parked silently on the sidewalk. She waited a few seconds, her hands on the wheel, as if she was deciding whether it was a good idea to get out or not. That should have made me realize there was something fishy, but unfortunately I only realized that later.

'Okay, let's go,' she said, more for herself than me.  
I nodded and got out of the car, making my way around it to open the trunk.

'Shit...' I muttered at the sight of the bare carpet.  
'What is it?' she asked me.  
'The case of guns is not here' I replied, barely looking at her. 'I hope this friend of yours is reliable because we're on our own with no weapons.'  
She said nothing and closed the trunk, nodding her head toward a flight of stairs diving into the darkness. I followed her, though a bit hesitant because I didn't trust her, not to mention that this place was giving me creeps. She walked down the steps slowly and stopped in front of a large metal door with no handle.  
'Once we're in here, you gotta stay close to me,' she told me, her voice sounding a little unusual, as if she was trying to keep a light tone tough she was emphasizing each of her words clearly as if it was the only thing I needed to remember.

I didn't take her advise seriously – as a matter of fact I didn't take her seriously – and I shrugged just to show I had heard her. She took a deep breath and pushed the door which opened – surprisingly easily – on a corridor even darker than the outside, only lit by a few, dim lights embedded in the walls. We took a few steps into the unknown and the heavy door closed loudly on us. Without the light coming from the outside, it was even harder to make out things in the gloom of the narrow space ahead of us, and I watched carefully where I put my feet to avoid stepping on anything. As much as I hated obeying her orders, I followed Olivia closely, because she seemed to know where she was heading. We walked past many doors, so many that I supposed they led to rooms that were probably as big as a closet. Giant navy blue letters and numbers were stuck on their thick windows which prevented anyone from peeking inside. We strolled about the corridor for long minutes, not really knowing what exactly we were looking for, nor when we would find it.

'Are you sure this is where you friend is?' I asked in a whisper, turning on my heels to try and find something we had missed. I froze when I realized that that something that I had missed had come to me, and appeared to be something very unexpected and very inconvenient. I found myself standing a few inches away from the barrel of a gun pointed right at my forehead. The man holding it was staring at me with intense blue eyes, his forefinger across his lips to order me to remain silent without having to speak a word. I held my breath, hoping that Olivia would notice something before it was too late.

'Yes, I'm sure,' she answered without turning to look at me.

The man draw me to him by the wrist and, without a sound, wrapped his muscular arm around my shoulder, his calloused hand on my mouth, the gun pressed tightly on my temple, and he guided me backward into an obscure room. The door closed on us and I only had the time to hear a light 'Peter?' coming from her, followed by a muffled gasp. I was pushed roughly against a wall, and I tried to take the opportunity to have the upper hand over him before he could do anything. Unfortunately, I ran into what was probably a chair and fell hard on the floor, my legs trapped between the ones of the chair. I heard a brisk laugh followed by a clicking sound. After a few seconds, a blinding light enlightened the whole room, and I had to protect my eyes from the sudden brightness with my arm. I felt two strong hands grab me by the shoulders, lift me up and push me back against the wall. I blinked a few times trying to adjust to the light, and when I finally was able to open my eyes I noticed the man had put the chair back on its legs, and was offering me to take a seat with a devilish grin. I stared at him with all the defiance I could show but sat nonetheless, thinking he was of the 'quick to shoot' kind.

'Thank you', he said with a forced smile that looked everything but friendly.  
He got around me and took a pair of handcuffs hanging from his belt before grabbing my wrists and twisting my arms behind my back. I almost let out a whimper of pain when he closed them tightly, to the point I felt my skin being cut.

'You got the wrong guy,' I said, repositioning myself on the chair to ease the pain. 'I'm not who you think I am.'  
'I know who you are,' he said with sparkling eyes. 'It's all in here,' he added, tapping his temple with his fingers. ' I know everything about you, Peter Bishop. Every single detail of your miserable life.'

His electric blue eyes looked even more intimidating in this bright light and I noticed the insidious air of superiority emanating from them. He crossed his arms on his chest and stared at me for long minutes, as if he was trying to decipher me, taking in every tiny detail he could. I waited anxiously, because I didn't know what he wanted from me. I had often found myself in such situations in the past, but the circumstances were very different. Dealing with Big Eddie's underlings was a child's play, but that smiling man in front of me was not of the same kind. He looked intelligent, and he obviously knew enough to get whatever he wished. The best way out was to keep my mouth shut for as long as possible and do my best not to give him any information at all. I lowered my eyes to my knees, debating whether I ought to do something else to try and get out of this damned place or not. The silence was broke by the unbearable noise of his fingers tapping the door, over and over again, but I ignored it, concentrating on things that preoccupied me much more than that. He suddenly stopped, and laughed. I heard walk about the room for a little time, and felt that he had stopped in front of me.

'What do you want?' I grunted, my fingers clenching around the leg of the chair.  
'Why did you come here?'  
'We just happened to pass by and we thought we might just take a look around.'

The grin I wore quickly disappeared when his strong fist hit my face violently, splitting my cheekbone. I wiped the blood I felt rolling on my cheek on my shoulder, and lifted my head to look at him into the eyes. His own smile had disappeared too, and I noticed his hands were shaking a little – though not as much as mine.

'Why did you come here?' he repeated, this time more loudly, and dangerously getting closer to my face.  
'Just told you, we stopped here like half an hour ago,' I dared, closing my eyes in anticipation of the blow I felt coming. The chair almost fell backward when he punched me once again, but he grasped me by the collar just in time.  
'I swear to you Bishop,' he whispered in my ear. 'If you don't tell me what brought you here I'll blow your damn head off!'

I stared at him with my fiercest look, feeling my cheek swelling, and I would probably have hold his frosty stare for much more longer, if it wasn't for the photograph of Olivia he waved right under my nose...

* * *

It's been like an eternity since I've uploaded this story, and I am _so_ sorry ! I had tons of exams to prepare and I really didn't get the time to write !

Anyway, here is a new chapter, it's not very long but I'll try to write another one whether in a few days or next week, I still don't know.  
I hope you still like it ! :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

I took a deep breath when I saw Olivia's face staring back at me and tried to remain impassive – which wasn't very difficult as my face was so swollen that I even had difficulties to open my mouth. Things were becoming complicated, because that photo meant he knew her and that he planned something involving her. And he could totally use it to make me confess things he wanted to know, because I could deal with being beaten up, but not with a threatened Olivia.

'You know that woman, don't you?' he asked, folding the photograph and putting it back in his pocket.

I nodded, I knew it was useless to lie to him, and he crouched in front of me probably to get a better look at me.

'Well,' he said lowly, crossing his fingers. 'If you don't tell me why you came here, she might be dead by tomorrow.'  
'Dead?' I whispered, the air suddenly turning heavy and hard to breathe.  
'We are currently running a little experiment for Mr. Secretary. I can't tell you much about it, of course, but believe me when I say it wouldn't take much to mess it up... It appears to be complicated to dose a drug that hasn't been tested yet.'

He tapped my knee with his big fingers and got back on his feet, dominating me from all his height. The little information he revealed was not comforting at all, and I knew he was not joking when he talked about killing Olivia. He worked for my father on the other side, that meant he had to be a shapeshifter. However, I had no idea what the experiment might be, the only thing I learned was that it involved both my Olivia and probably the one that must have been trapped somewhere in that building along with me. I did not know what to do, because he could very well be lying – the Walter Bishop from the other universe had much more influence and power that the one from over here and I doubted anyone would dare to overstep his direct orders – but he could mean it too. And all reason apart, I loved her too much to take any risks, and I should consider the worse than could happen to take a decision. He didn't seem have a walkie-talkie nor a cellphone, so whether he was working alone or his men were still around. That left me a considerable amount of time to try and find a proper solution. I closed my eyes, doing my best to ignore his pacing around me, but after a few minutes he stopped behind me and put both his strong hands on my shoulder. He bent forward so that his mouth was close to my ear, so close that it made me shudder.

'Are you going to tell me what do you want from us or not?' he murmured in the most unpleasant tone I had ever heard.  
'Don't know yet' I replied, trying to spare some time.

Of course, that wasn't the answer he was hoping for, and I squeezed my eyes shut, waiting for another blow. He grabbed my hair and tilted my head backward before I felt his knuckles crushing my nose. A wave of blood trickled down my chin and throat and the disgusting taste of copper filled my mouth. It hurt a lot and a terrible headache was beginning to be felt, but at least I had saved precious minutes. I felt stupid not to tell him that I didn't even know who he was and that we hadn't come for him, but on the other hand I knew that he wouldn't believe me. I had played with him too much and lost the little trust he could have felt toward me.

'What's the experiment?' I asked, licking my bloody lips.

I hoped that would have distracted him a bit, even if wouldn't give me an answer. He got back in front of me and crossed his arms across his chest, the back of his right hand coated with my blood.

'Stuff about Dunham and her other version. Even if I wanted to tell you I couldn't. I have orders, follow them, end of story.'

He leaned against the wall and took a cigarette out of his pocket, along with a bright red lighter. He took his time to smoke it, blowing clouds of greyish smoke from time to time, while I sat wondering what kind of experiment they could run involving Olivia and her alter-self. Maybe they were aware of the weird connection they had and which Walter was trying to fix? I wouldn't have been much surprise to discover some of the Secretary's agents had witnessed what had happened over there between them. I thought of that other universe as a world governed by some kind of Big Brother watching people every day and night, with hundreds of pairs of eyes looking at them from the zeppelins in the sky and thousands of cameras hidden in their apartments. And of course, they would have been quick to spot such an abnormality as a sex scene between two same persons. That must have caught the Secretary's attention and he would have obviously wanted to be the first to study the whole thing. Or maybe they just wanted to know if Cortexiphan would work on their Olivia so they could use her as a tool to destroy our universe? That would make sense to, it was my father's ultimate goal that he tried to prove to be of noble intentions.  
The man took a last puff at his cigarette and came closer to me, bending once again toward me.

'So,' he said, releasing his stinking smoke on my face. 'I've already broken your nose. You want me to break something else or you're going to tell me why you're here?'  
'I want to know what you're going to do to Olivia first,' I said, holding his stare.  
'You're not in the position to haggle, dear boy,' he smiled, stroking the top of my head as if I were his puppy.

I tried to recoil from him, squirming on my chair, but he put his hands on my cheeks, lifting my head up.

'Just tell me, okay? I don't care about you, you're not my priority, but you understand that I can't let you go if you don't tell me what you wanted.'

I wondered for a moment whether I ought to tell him the truth or not. There was just one way I could prove him I wasn't there for him or any other of his men, but I had the bad feeling he wouldn't like it. I shook my head, knowing that I had to give it a try if I ever wanted to get out of here. I slowly got on my feet, and stopped moving when I saw him reach for his gun tucked in his belt.

'It's okay', I told him, finally able to stand properly. 'I just got something in my pocket I want to show you.'

He looked suspiciously at me, his gun pointed at my face, while I was slipping my hands in the pocket of my jeans, my fingers pinching the edge of the small device. I turned on my heels and dropped it on the floor in front of him. He knelt on the floor and picked it up, his cheeks turning red hot. He turned it in his hands, and they were covered with what was left of mercury on it in seconds.

'We got here to meet somebody who could have helped us with these, but they don't seem to be here anymore,' I said, sitting back on the chair. 'I guess you know what this is given you've got the same. We killed your friends, just a few hours ago. Sorry.'  
'What the...?' he started, lifting his eyes up to meet mine, apparently madder at me than I had expected.

Fortunately, he was interrupted by a loud knock on the door, and he hurried to it not without giving me a dark look.

'What is it? ' he barked to the man standing behind the door.  
'Phase two is ready, we're waiting for you,' a weak voice said shyly.  
'I'm busy right now, ask Mark.'  
'He's busy too, he's with her in the next room...'  
'Then go and do it yourself,' the man grunted, his hand on the handle. ' And increase the dose to the maximum.'

He smashed the door and I jumped with fear, realizing he might have given the order to kill Olivia. He stared at me with a wicked smile and his hand tightened on his gun, but the only thing I could think of was that Olivia was going to die. Again. Thousands of things ran through my brain in just a second, and I remained agape for a moment, having no idea of what to do. I heard the light click of the security being removed, and saw his finger on the trigger. This couldn't happen. This wasn't the way it was supposed to happen. A wave of unknown energy ran through me and I quickly stood up under his surprised look. I ran into him, pushing him hardly against the wall, and the gun dropped on the floor with a loud thump. With my hands tightly bound behind my back, I couldn't do much, and the only idea I had had very little chance to end well. But as it was the only way I could get out of this mess and I hadn't much time to take a decision. I quickly turned on my heels before he could make a move, lifted my hands, took a few little steps forward, and threw my arms around his head. I then suddenly and forcefully lowered them, forcing him to kneel behind me. The handcuffs around his neck were strangling him, I could hear him choke, his head was diving in the small of my back, but I knew that would only knock him out for a moment. He struggled during long seconds, and I lifted my hands a little to hurry things a bit. He finally stopped squirming and I was quick to release him. I knelt on the floor and passed both of my legs between my arms so that my hands were finally in front of me. There were still attached, but at least I was able to use them. I picked up the gun on the floor and keeping him in my line of sight, I searched the man's pocket in the hope to find the keys of the handcuffs. There were two keys, but none were fit to the little lock, so I gave up the idea. I checked him one last time only to see that he was slowly regaining consciousness, and I left the room quietly, in case there were others waiting for me. The dark corridor was empty, and I headed to the closest door where Olivia was supposed to be. I prepared my gun and knocked sharply on the door, pricking my ear. I heard some movement inside, and finally a tall blond man opened the door. I shot him unceremoniously in the head and entered the little room. Olivia was there and I sighed of relief when I saw she looked quite well.

'God, what did they do to you?' she breathed, stretching her hand toward my face.  
'It doesn't matter,' I said, my breath short. 'You take this,' I said handing her the gun, 'and give me the keys of the car.'  
'What? I...'  
'Just give me the fucking keys, dammit, we don't have time!' I cried, feeling pearls of sweat sliding on my temples.

She searched her pockets a moment and finally gave me the bunch of keys.

'There another shapeshifter in next room. He's almost woken up, you'd better go now. I'll be back as fast as possible.' I finished, returning to the corridor.  
'Is Olivia alright?' she asked.

I didn't take the time to answer, both because I didn't know the answer myself and because there wasn't much of it left, and ran through the corridor, looking for the , I found the heavy door in a matter of seconds, and I sighed of relief when I finally was able to breathe in some fresh air. I wiped my forehead on my arm and hurried to the car, trying all the buttons of the car's key with my trembling fingers. It finally opened with a shrill sound and I opened the door, almost throwing myself on the seat. I didn't even put the security belt and started the car, pushing the gear shift with my elbow. It wasn't going to be easy to drive handcuffed, but I was going to have to manage. My foot was crushing the accelerator, the tires were screeching every time I took a bend, but I didn't pay any attention to it. The only thing I wanted was to be there in time. Once I reached the city and I was not alone anymore, the sounds of people honking at me added to the overall hubbub of the streets, causing my headache to get even worse, and I encountered difficulties to remain concentrated on the road. I took a quick look at my watch, wondering how much time had passed since the man had left, but as I didn't have any point of reference it was useless. All I could hope for was that it wasn't too late. I made my way through the traffic jam and I was glad to park in front of the hospital. I left the car door open, keys inside, but I honestly didn't care much. I didn't listen to the cries of protests I heard rising behind me and rushed to the reception, breathless.

'Olivia Dunham's room,' I blurted out, drops of blood springing on the sheets of paper in front of the poor woman. 'Quick!' I cried out as she stared blankly at me, smashing my hands on the counter.  
'Right', she nodded, starting to type quickly on her keyboard. 'Room 203, second floor,' she told me after a few seconds, apparently shocked.

I nodded and ran toward the stairs, not wanting to lose time waiting for the elevators. Panting, I finally reached a long corridor and I started looking for the numbers on the small plaques stuck on the doors. _198, 199, 200_... I walked past a tray of food and decided to steal the knife, in case it might be useful. _201, 202_... And 203. The door was already half-open, and I could distinctly hear some movement inside. My fingers tightened around the knife and I took a few silent steps inside. The man who was there was clearly not a doctor, he was wearing a black coat, and a case full of little bottles was at his feet. I prepared my weapon and approached him carefully, as any of my footsteps could betray. Once I was at a proper distance, I threw my arms around his hand, and pulled on the cuffs so that I could strangle him if he tried anything. The blade of the knife was on the base of his throat and I would not have hesitated to cut it.

'I wouldn't do this if I were you,' I whispered in his ear.

He dropped what he had in his hands – a syringe and a full bottle which broke into pieces – and I felt his nails scratching the skin of my hands. He was gasping for air, but I wouldn't let go. I checked Olivia to see if there was anything abnormal, and my eyes fell on another bottle lying on the sheet. Empty.

'What's that?' I said sharply, digging the blade deeper, realizing that, in the end, he might actually have done it.  
'The first shot' he replied in a breath, losing his strength. ' It's too late.'

I let him fall at my feet, my hands shaking, and picked up the empty bottle. There was no label, no inscription whatsoever to indicate what had been in it. I turned to the man on the floor, whose face was flushed, and knelt next to him, showing him the bottle.

'What is this?' I asked, trying to control my trembling voice.

He shook his head with a sheepish smile and I breathed in deeply, resisting the urge to kill him. I stood up and sat on the edge of the bed, just to make sure Olivia was alright. She looked much paler than usual, the bandage around her shoulder seemed too thick for her small frame, the pipe coming out of her mouth seemed too big for her thin neck... Her chest was heaving slightly, it was reassuring somehow, although I could see it was a very weak breathing. I noticed a little pearl of blood on her left arm where the shapeshifter had pricked his needle, but I didn't want to wipe it with my dirty hands. I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hands, exhausted and downcast. He had said that it was too late... What did that mean? She was going to die? Or maybe that shot was enough to carry out the experiment? I sighed, knowing that I would have the answer later, hoping that things would get soon better. I got on my feet to go and look for a security officer, and when I took a last glance at the man lying at my feet, I noticed with hand was traveling down his pants to reach for the back-up gun tied on his ankle. I walked on his wrist, he gasped in pain and I took my knife that I had put in my pocket. The knife went through his hand, preventing him from reaching his weapon. I put my hands on both sides of his head, ignoring his pleading look. And I wrung his neck.

'You asked for it.'

* * *

_I got the idea for this chapter yesterday (I honestly had no idea of what was going to happen until then) and I really enjoyed writing it ! :-)_

_It's longer than most of the other chapters, but as it's one of the few Peter's POV chapter I think it's worth it ! ^o^_

_I hope you like it, and if you have any comments, please review ! :) _

_Next chapter, I may return to Fauxlivia's POV, but I don't when I'm going to post it ! (in a little time, I hope!)_


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

When the man opened the door, I hadn't expected to hear the loud explosion of a gunshot and see drops of mercury spurting on the walls. I got up quickly, not really aware of what was happening, and when I saw Peter standing in the frame I sighed softly of relief. He looked quite messed up, there was a large cut on his cheek, blood was splattered everywhere on his swollen face, and one of his eyes was reduced to a small slit in the hurt flesh.

'God, what did they do to you?' I whispered, although I knew he wouldn't believe my concern to be genuine.  
'It doesn't matter,' he quickly replied, looking a bit frantic. 'You take this,' he urged, putting a gun into my hand, 'and give me the keys of the car.'  
'What?' I asked, not understanding what could drive him so stressed. 'I...'  
'Just give me the fucking keys, dammit, we don't have time!' he cried out, exasperated.

I nodded, and quickly fumbled for the keys in my pockets. It was a chance the shapeshifter hadn't searched me and I found the bunch of keys in my cargo pants. He almost snatched them from me and got out of the room, only turning on his heels to tell me that there was another shapeshifter in the next room and that I'd better go and keep a watch on him. He finally started to run in the corridor toward the exit, and I only got the time to rush after him and yell :

'Is Olivia alright?'

He didn't answer and I stopped dead in my tracks, that awful feeling of being kept in the dark helplessness crushing on me all over again. I sighed and brushed the back of my hand across my forehead, and then remembered that I had to keep an eye on the shapeshifter. When I entered the room he was in, he was slowly beginning to rise on his feet, but I dissuaded him by putting the barrel of the gun on his shoulder. He grunted and his back slid against the wall as I closed the door behind me. I could notice some of the signs revealing events that had happened in here minutes ago, like the drops of blood on the floor and the chair overturned. I put it back on its leg and sat down, watching silently the man sitting in front of me. His hands were crossed on his knees and he seemed quite calm, given the circumstances. I studied him, trying to determine what kind of man that body could have once belonged to. His face had soft features, and if it was not for the gleam of mischief and wickedness shining in his eyes, he would have looked a lot nicer. This body wasn't fit to do the things a shapeshifter does, those strong hands hadn't been made to kill, that mouth hadn't been made to whisper threats in innocents' ears, those eyes were not meant to be the last ones to be seen by a dying man. And yet, there it was, right in front of me, mastered by an emotionless machine which had no other purpose than to do the world harm. I looked down, unable to bear the sight of him anymore. I knew I wasn't perfect either, that I had hurt many people and that I would never be as good as Olivia, or any other good guy I had had the opportunity to meet, but I thought – and begged – that I would never be as bad as that monster sitting against the wall.

It was hot in the room, and I rolled my sleeves up to try and cool down a little. My eyes were instantaneously drawn to the little drop of blood pearling on my forearm, and I looked at it suspiciously, beginning to wonder what they might have gave me all over again. I had tried to resist when the other man had come to me with the syringe, but I had simply been unable to prevent him from pricking my arm. He hadn't told me anything and I didn't what it was about, nor what effect it was going to have on me. I wiped the blood with the tip of my finger, but of course the drop I had just cleaned was soon replaced by another one. I sighed and leaned back in the chair, fiddling the hem of my long-sleeved tee-shirt, lost in my thoughts flooding my brain.

'What is it?' I finally asked, needing to get rid of them. 'That thing you gave me, what is it?'  
'You'll see by yourself when the time comes,' he answered with a cocky grin. 'Or I should say, you'll feel it.'

His smile grew wider as he said those words lowly, as if he meant to speak to himself and yet wanting me to hear. He arched his eyebrow and flicked his tongue across his lips, and the simple move was so obscene that my heart missed a few beats at the simple thought that maybe...

'What do you mean?' I asked, my mouth drier that a desert and my hands suddenly sweaty.  
'I heard it was pretty hot,' he whispered with a gleam of lust in his eyes, winking as if he had just shared an awesome secret with me.  
Blinded by a sudden flash of intense rage, I dashed to him, grasped him violently by the collar of his shirt and pinned him against the wall.  
'How do you know about this?' I eructed between my clenched teeth.  
'Don't pretend you didn't know you were observed...' he said, squirming uneasily, still smiling. 'Those videophones are so easy to hack into... A chance they turned it on right in time.'  
'How many people have seen this?' I barked, shaking him so violently that his head banged against the hard surface.  
'Officially, only three...' he smirked, blinking to chase the stars in front of his eyes, probably. 'The two officers from the control room, and the Secretary. But unofficially...'  
'How many?' I repeated, my face inches from his, my heart already sinking in my heart.  
'I don't know. The record was quickly made confidential, so not as much as you may think, I suppose. Still, enough for me to hear about it. It is said to be one of the best porn movie of the last decade, is that right?'

I hit him hard with the butt of the gun, not to punish him for what he had said, because I was quite unable to make sense of it, but not to stay aghast and do nothing. He fell back on the floor with a grunt of pain, and I could only watch him slid against the wall, trying hard not to go to pieces. I hid my face in my palms, feeling my cheeks hot under my fingers, and crouched, not even bothering to sit back on the chair to grant me some kind of composure. I felt sick, ashamed, and the only thing I wanted was to disappear through the floor and never see him again. I knew I shouldn't feel that way, but the only thing he had done was to make me despise myself. He had turned the hate I felt toward him into self-hatred. Because I knew that I should have realized anyone could spy on me at any moment, particularly when I had done it that way many times. Scenes of what had happened in my apartment with Olivia were flashing behind my eyelids and it only made it all worse. Those things we had done, the way we had behaved, that was not something I would have wanted people to see and I should have been aware of the risks such a behavior could lead to. The Secretary, and probably dozens of men must have seen that video, they had watched me in a very personal situation that was supposed to have never happened. I just couldn't be cool with the fact that most of them compared me to a freaking porn star playing dirty games with an alternate version of myself. That didn't feel right at all. Of course, I knew that's how it looked like from the outside, but I couldn't help thinking they shouldn't judge what they saw when they had no idea what was going on. After all, it wasn't my fault. I hadn't want it to happen, it just did for a still quite obscure reason. They should have realized any sane people would have never done such a thing on purpose. No, it wasn't my fault. And they could think of me in every way they wanted, I didn't mind. Whatever they believed they knew about me, they could only be wrong.

Or maybe the Secretary knew what really happened? He was the only one clever enough to realize that it was a consequence of something, and I wouldn't doubt his finding the origin of it, just like the Walter from this side did. Well, I wasn't a hundred percent sure he was right, but at least his assumptions were some kind of proof convincing me that a scientific explanation could be found. It didn't matter what others were thinking as long as I believed there was rational fact to justify what happened. Plus, I didn't regret it. I felt no remorse regarding what we had experienced back in my apartment, because it had led me there. I loved Olivia and I was more than happy to be on her side. That was why I shouldn't have been ashamed, and I shouldn't have cared that much about scatterbrained men that I would never meet anyway.

I glanced at the shapeshifter with that thought in mind, but when I saw that nasty grin of his and the way he stared at me, I felt my cheeks going on fire once again. It was above my forces to pretend there was nothing to be ashamed about – although he said he hadn't seen anything, I didn't believe him – and that was one of the few feeling I couldn't deal with. I rose on my feet and turned my back away from him, unable to look at him in the eyes. He only wanted to destabilize me, and it was working. I wiped my hot forehead with my palm, finding a spot on the wall to concentrate on. I could feel his eyes on me and I could perfectly imagine the kind of smile he was wearing. I tried to think of what Olivia would have done in such a case. Would she have shaken it off as if she didn't care or would she have killed him the second he told her he'd seen her having sex with her alter-self? After a few seconds of reflexion, I realized I didn't know. I guessed she would simply have sat in a corner of the room and died of shame. If I couldn't take it, she couldn't either. Or at least I thought so. I still didn't know her that well and I would have found it hard to answer any other personal question about her. I brushed my nose with the back of my hand, hoping I would get to know her better than I did. I wanted to know her, I wanted to learn every single detail that made her so different from me. I was hoping to get nicer, better living on her side, and that would start by finding out how I could improve observing her.

But now wasn't the time to think about that. I checked the time on my watch and made a quick calculation. Peter had been gone for twenty minutes, more or less, and he should have been at the hospital already. Fear tugged at my stomach, I was hoping so hard that he would get in time to prevent any more problems that my fingers had curled in a strong fist, my knuckles becoming white pale.

'Tick... Tock...' the shapeshifter started, and I could even hear his smile as he talked. 'Tick... Tock...'

He had probably seen me look at my watch, and found another way to drive me nuts. I was usually quite patient when it came to resist this kind of atrocious methods to fly people off the handle, but I was so stressed and scared that the worse would happen that I couldn't take it. I rushed to him and pinned him once again against the wall with my forearm and pressing forcefully the gun on his temple. I hated it so much at that moment that I would have wanted to put a bullet through his damn brain, but that was the only thing he wanted and I would certainly not give him the pleasure. I was on edge, all the hatred I felt toward him, all that resentment grew into a bubbling cacophony in my chest and I felt so tensed that I wouldn't have been surprised at all if I had burst into tears. I stared at him for a long moment, my eyes probably dark an my hands trembling so much that I thought more than once I had actually pulled the trigger. It would have lasted long if I hadn't been interrupted by a sharp pain in my shoulder that I didn't know where was coming from. I almost dropped the gun and for a second I saw a flash of victorious pride in his eyes – probably because he thought he could jump on the occasion to get away – but I was quick to grab him by the collar and push him back against the wall. I had no idea why my shoulder was hurting like that, and I didn't understand it any better when my stomach became suddenly painful too. I was sure I had already experienced this kind of pain once, and after a few seconds of reflexion it popped in my head. A gunshot wound. I made the connection instantaneously and stared even deeper into the shapeshifter.

'You know what's happening, don't you?' I whispered, trying to ignore the growing pain.

He waited a moment, savoring with an unbearable attitude of contentment his victory.

'It worked.' he said with a smile, looking down at my shirt. 'The drug worked. Bishop didn't get there in time. You're doomed.'

* * *

_I don't how I got the inspiration, but I've never written this fast ! ^o^_

_Next chapter will still be from Fauxlivia's POV, I think, but I haven't got the tiniest idea of what's going to happen, so this time it may take a little longer before I update this story ! :)_

_I hope you still like it, and I promise there will be some Olivia/Fauxlivia soon ! =)  
_


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

The sun was filtering through the large window panes, a sweet wave of heat caressing his neck. Leaning back in his leather armchair, the cup of smoking coffee feeling hot in his hand, he was watching with a nonchalant detachment the video playing on his screen. He knew it wasn't live, it was only a recording of what had happened the day before. That was how it worked, and how it had been working ever since the secret mission had started. His agents crossed into the other universe, and filmed every single minute of what happened, even if it proved to be irrelevant with the experiment. Then the records were analyzed by a scientific team, tons of notes were written down and saved, copies were made and archived. That was the reason why he only had access to the data the day later.

Walter Bishop was a man of power and could give orders to make things go faster, but he wanted the experiment to be successful, and hurrying things just to quench his need for knowledge was not his priority. He skimmed through the few pages of the file spread on his desk, taking a sip of his coffee, and put down his cup when he spotted what he was looking for. He smiled for himself when he read the lines at the top of the page. He hadn't believed his agents were smart enough to conduct the experiment properly, but it seemed that he had been wrong. According to the report, both the Olivia from his universe and the other had been injected with the serum. Things were going a lot better than he had first expected. And he would have his answers sooner, too. When he had witnessed that bizarre scene a few weeks earlier, two thoughts had crossed his mind : first, they had lost their minds. But then he hadquickly pushed this thought away -he perfectly knew that they were both far from insane-, so he had come to the conclusion that some kind of unexplained scientific phenomenon was happening in front of his eyes. He had only half-believed his guess, but all those hours of spying on them in the other universe had comforted his theory, especially when he had watched the footage of his doppelganger explaining the pheromone thing. But his lunatic alternate-self had lost most of his scientific instinct and had not felt the need to go deeper into the question, to try and enhance the chemical reaction and had just tried – unsuccessfully – to develop an inhibitor instead.

The Secretary maybe didn't work very often in his lab anymore, but the need to prove theories right or wrong, especially when they were about alternate universes and their undiscovered particularities, was still stirring in him whenever he had the occasions. And so he had worked a lot with his partner to develop a serum that would have the desired effect. Within a few days they had created the perfect solution in a very reasonable quantity. They even had had enough of it to test it on animal subjects. They had stolen a chimp from the zoo of Boston in the alternate universe – which had not gone unnoticed – and took the same one from their own. The result had been quite conclusive : the chimps had developed extraordinary abilities, like sharing thoughts, and an amazing complicity had bloomed. One of the result had particularly been interesting : when one of the chimp got hurt, the other one instantly found itself hurt too. It had been proved then that the connection between the two animals was so profound that if one of the chimp was wounded, the other one would share the wound and both of them would suffer the same pain.

So of course, the Secretary had been more than enchanted and his desire to test it on human subjects grew even stronger. The first purpose of this experiment had been to discover what kind of effect such bonds could have, but now that he knew he wanted to go further and find out to how far that could be pushed. He wanted to cross the limits, achieve a scientific knowledge that no one had ever reached before. And by pushing the experiment further maybe he would discover ways to become even more powerful and impose his policies beyond his universe's frontiers. Because if this serum could give that much power to simple chimpanzees, it could probably do wonders with human-beings. He would just have to find a way to make his own pairs, but that shouldn't be very difficult.

Yes. Walter Bishop was on his way to make a major breakthrough in science history, and he would be the only one to benefit from it.

He straightened in his armchair when someone knocked at his door.

'Come in,' he said sharply, erasing the smile of satisfaction that had spread naturally on his lips.

'Hello, sir', his lab partner greeted, not daring to look directly at him. 'I've just come to give you yesterday's footage. There's some pretty interesting stuff that I'm sure you'll be glad to see.'

'Thank you.'

The Secretary waited patiently until the tall man left and then hurried to take the CD that had been carefully put on his desk. He inserted it in his computer and clicked on the 'play' button that has just appeared on the screen. There wasn't much to see on this one, and yet he knew that the little he was going to witness would be one of the most important step of the entire process. The first thing that appeared on the plasma was the image of an empty room. After a few seconds, one of his infiltrated men entered the room pushing a woman – whom he recognized as his Olivia – in the small of her back. The Secretary took in every single detail of the scene, although it was not necessary. Their mute conversation wasn't of any particular interest. He grinned when another man finally entered too, carrying a small suitcase, and took out the serum.

'This is perfect,' he whispered in his silent office when what he wanted to see the most finally happened – meaning the two shots of serum injected in her arm. He hadn't the video of the other Olivia being given the precious solution but he knew from the report the operation had also been a success. All was going smoothly – a lot more than he would have expected it to.

He watched the last part of the sequence, which only served as a visual confirmation of what he already knew. He did nothing the hide the victorious smile of pride spreading on his face when he watched his supposedly unbreakable agent falling to the floor, her tee-shirt smeared with blood. That was the only clue that proved his serum was working. She was sharing her alternate's wounds, just like the chimps had. Now, he would have to wait and see what would come next, but he had no doubt it wouldn't be long before other effects of his serum would be felt.

* * *

_I'm so sorry it took so long to update this story but I really don't have much time these days!_

_This chapter is short, but I think I'll stick to this format from now on, it's easier and hopefully that will allow me to post regular updates more often !_

_Thanks for reading and please comment if you like it (or even if you don't, just let me know why ! ;))_


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

I ground my teeth when I let go of the shapeshifter's head, when it fell on the floor with a thump. As much as I loved looking at this bastard lying at my feet, I also hated killing people. I knew he was not human. I knew it was a killer. And I knew he had well-deserved this. But I always had a hard time facing death when it wasn't my own. Everything I had been through before integrating the Fringe Division had often involved me standing in front of it – there was no such thing as safety when being a con-man – and I got used to it. I wasn't scared, and when my time would come I would welcome it with wide-open arms. But I didn't like being Death myself. It was something entirely different.

I quickly looked away from the lifeless body and turned to Olivia. I sat on the edge of her bed, careful not to shake her fragile body. I pushed away a lock of blond hair falling on her forehead, and noticed with a frown of surprise that some color had returned to her cheeks. They weren't marble pale anymore, some shades of pink had appeared. Her breathing sounded less laborious and I even thought for a moment she was going to open her eyes. I had no idea why she looked healthier, but the thought crossed my mind that maybe she was getting better thanks to what the shapeshifter had given her. But that was nonsense, of course, they tried to kill her, how could they possibly want to save her? I shook my head and contented myself with the fact that she may actually get through this – which had been no more than a bold hope.

I got on my feet, knowing there was no use staying in here, and that there were a lot of things to be taken care of. I was about to leave the room when a cellphone rang. It could only come from the shapeshifter. I bent over him against my will and searched his pockets, first the ones of his pants, but finding nothing moved to his jacket. I picked up the phone, but of course the name was unkown to me, just like the number. I decided to answer anyway.

'Hello?' I said, knowing what kind of guy must be at the other end of the line.

'Well well,' the voice of a man answered, and I could almost feel his smile through the phone. 'I'm disappointed, you know, I really thought you could have stopped Larry in time. I assume he's dead as you're answering his phone?'

I realized after a few second that this man was actually the shapeshifter that had watched over me back to that gloomy place.

'He is,' I confirmed. 'How do you know I didn't get there in time?'

'Because the Dunham I've got here is in pretty bad shape. I'd say you'd better get here soon, you know, before she dies.'

My eyes grew wider when I realized that the other Olivia was supposed to be watching him.

'What have you done to her?' I muttered between clenched teeth.

'Me? Nothing. The serum did. Sorry dude, gotta go. Oh, and be quick. It looks _really_ bad.'

He hung up and I found myself listening to the boring dialing tone for a few seconds, until I realized I was the one that needed to do something. _Fuck_. I bit the inside of my cheek, tired of being involved in a situation that was not even supposed to happen, and most of all that has supposedly nothing to do with me.

'When will this finally be over?' I whispered, resisting the temptation to grab my head and throw it against the wall. I exhaled a short, sharp breath to compose myself and finally left the room to find a doctor.

'You!' I intercepted a man wearing a white gown. 'Have you got pliers or something that could cut these?' I asked, showing him the handcuffs and my lacerated wrists.

'What the...?' he started, ready to take out his pager and call for the security.

'Look, I'm with the FBI, you can check that later with my superior, but now I'm really needed somewhere and I just can't go with these fucking handcuffs on, so you're gonna help me or what?'

'Okay, wait right here,' he said, a not quite comforting look of doubt remaining in his eyes.

'Don't fool me' I warned with a dark look, hoping that wasn't his intention.

He nodded and disappeared at the end of the corridor, and so I began pacing along the wall, taking a look at my watch every ten seconds. Several minutes had already passed and I didn't know if it was already too late. After another couple of minutes of wandering around, I finally spotted him with what looked like a pair of surgical pliers in his hands. I sighed of relief and stretched out my arms so that he could cut the handcuffs.

'I don't know if this is gonna work' he said, his breath short. 'We don't use these a lot anymore, now we've got electric saws and everything. It's good to cut bones, but metal...'

'Try it anyway,' I said quickly, shaking my hands impatiently.

'Okay,' he nodded, grabbing his tool forcefully.

He gave it a first try which proved to be unsuccessful. I swallowed hard, thinking that I would never get back to the other Olivia in time.

'Come on,' the doctor whispered lowly, his glasses sliding to the tip of his nose. 'Okay, got it!' he finally exclaimed as I felt the tension between my two wrists finally being released. I sighed of relief, stretching my arms and rolling my hurt joints.

'Thanks,' I said with a pat on his shoulder. 'Could you get me some medical stuff too, please? I may need some where I'm going.'

He led me to a trolley with shelves full of things, some I knew and some I didn't, but I only took what I thought what necessary, like bandages and surgical spirit.

'Thanks a lot,' I said once again, heading to the exit. 'Oh, can you call the FBI and ask for agent Broyles? Tell them it's Peter Bishop. And tell Broyles to meet me at the lab, there are things we need to discuss,' I finished, not taking the time to make sure he got everything. I ran to the car, careful not to let anything fall from my full arms. I was glad to find the car where I had left it – maybe luck hadn't totally left me after all. I threw all the medical things on the passenger seat and slammed the door shut before moving off with a roar. The journey was much more smoother now that I could use both my hands, though people kept honking at me relentlessly – smoother didn't mean safer. I was glad to realize I remembered where to go, I wouldn't lose time looking for the right way. I glanced at my watch once again. More than ten minutes had passed since the call. It wasn't good. What if she was bleeding to death? What if she was already dead? I focused on the road, my stomach twitching nervously every time I drove through a crowded intersection, staring in front of me. I relaxed a little when I finally reached the parts of the city where not a lot of people went, and the road became significantly clearer. I knew I wasn't far and yet the small distance I had to go seemed already too important given the situation. She could die within seconds, minutes, the shapeshifter may have very well lied to me and a bunch of his guys may be waiting for me, but I didn't know. I didn't know and I had to make sure. A few minutes later I finally parked in front of the gray building, examining the area to look for anything suspicious. There was nothing unusual, so I just opened the door, pick up all the medical stuff on the passenger seat and quickly made my way to the heavy door that I knew would lead to her. It was still dark, and I groped my way as fast as I could in the long corridor.

'Olivia!' I called loudly, hoping for an answer of any kind.

I pricked up my ear and exhaled softly when I heard my name being whimpered somewhere on my right. My fingers finally met what seemed to be a door, and my hand traveled on its side to look for the handle. I finally found the knob and pushed the door open, closing my eyes forcefully because of the bright light filling the room.

'Fuck,' I growled, blinking repeatedly to get used to the sudden brightness. 'You okay?'

'Been better,' she blurted out as if she found it hard to breath.

After a few seconds I finally was able to open my eyes properly and I spotted her on the wall opposite to me. She was sitting, slumped against it, her hands folded on her lap. Her baby blue tee-shirt was stained with blood, and drops of the red liquid were slowly but regularly dripping on the floor from the hem. I knelt next to her, shaking my head, unable to keep my mouth shut.

'I'm tired of this shit,' I muttered, dropping everything I was carrying in my arms. 'You two are running after trouble or what? Hell, look at you! Not even a week and already almost dead once again!'

'I'm not...' she said weakly and I picked up a pile of compresses.

'Of course you're not... How did he do that anyway ?'

'He didn't,' she replied softly, her eyelids fluttering. 'Those wounds are Olivia's...'

I stopped moving for a second when I realized she was right. The stomach, the shoulder, the bullet holes... That was something new, but I didn't have the time to think about that any more. I pinched my lips as I lifted her shirt up, bending to take a closer look at the wound.

'Damn...' I whispered as I applied compresses on the gaping wound. It looked bad. Maybe it was because of all the blood, maybe it wasn't as serious as I thought, but it looked really bad. The first compresses soon became drenched and I had to replace them with others after pouring a good amount of surgical spirit on her stomach. She jumped and let out a shriek of surprise and pain, but it was necessary.

'You now I won't be here for you all the time,' I said, tearing the sleeve of her tee-shirt to the base of her neck to examine her shoulder. 'I don't want your blood on my hands, Olivia's one is enough. I don't even do this for you. I do it for her.'

'Okay,' she said in a breath, finding enough strength to push me away. 'Fine. Go.'

She slowly tried to get on her feet, her bloody hands leaving red marks on the white wall.

'You're crazy, come on, lay down,' I ordered, trying to push her down without hurting her more than she already was.

'I don't want... To be a burden', she groaned, her fingers clenching on my forearm.

'That's not what I meant,' I said, looking nervously at the blood flooding out of the wound because of her movements. 'Please, just sit down and keep calm. I'm sorry, it's just... All of this shouldn't be happening and yet I'm right into it. I'm just tired of all of this.'

She stared at me with intense green eyes, and I had seen this look enough to know she didn't believe I was being sincere. And I knew she was right not to. Still, she slowly sat back on the floor, clinging to me, and I finally was able to replace the compresses one last time. I rolled a thick bandage around her waist so that the compresses on her stomach wouldn't fall, and another one tightly around her shoulder.

'Okay, I'm going to take you to Walter, he'll know what to do.'

She nodded lowly and slipped her hands around my neck when I scooped her into my arms. I could feel she was tensed, probably because of this high-voltage tension that remained between us, but her wounds were getting the better of her, and before I could reach the car she went limp into my arms, her head slumped on my shoulder.

* * *

_One more update this week, a little longer this time ! I think I know what the next will be about, so it shouldn't be long before I post it ! _

_Thanks for reading !_


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